There are truly some days I just sit and wonder why I can't be the best. I question, "perhaps, my goals were too unattainable?" or "maybe I should've worked harder?"

At this point in my life, I very much identify as a type-A person; meaning, I am quite the workaholic. It seems I eat, breathe and sleep academic textbooks. However, like many of you have I'm sure, I have moments where I kinda just want to eat food, breathe good ole' oxygen, and sleep....actually sleep.

Yet, my drive and overly ambitious nature sometimes get in the way of that (surprising, I know). Sometimes, the thought of not getting the validation that I desire (i.e. good grades) scares me. In turn, that fear manifests into a stressed-out, straight-a-getting machine. Unsurprisingly, my 8-hour straight studying sessions eventually turn into something I dread.

I've always just loved reading and writing purely for the want to learn. However, it seems when the writing and reading that I did became something that a grade was attached to, that love started to dim and my competitive streak went into overdrive. Being a competitive person, I tend to place a value on myself; therefore, when something occurs that reflects I may not have tried enough, I feel worthless. Small.

There's nothing worse than feeling like you aren't good enough or don't measure up to your goals. Of course, during childhood, I learned you shouldn't just run the race to get first place; however, it wasn't until I became a college student that I realized life is basically one big spectrum. It is never a definite win-or-lose situation. If life wasn't a spectrum, life would only be full of straight-a-students and straight-f-students.

However, we commonly see students of all academic accomplishments are awarded grades lower or higher than what they are used to. But, that doesn't mean they didn't work hard enough, it just means that they didn't win that particular race. Life itself is an endless track. There are so many races to run and so many to win and to lose. Winning and losing are big parts of learning how to be successful for that next race.

Putting aside the analogy, sometimes getting a C instead of an A on that seemingly awesome essay you wrote doesn't mean it wasn't good or that you didn't give it your best shot; it merely means you have a little more to learn, because the key to life is learning new things so you can apply that knowledge.