Losing My Guy Best Friend

It was the sixth grade and I saw you coming down the hall. An instant feeling hit me and I knew I needed to know more about you. We talked on and off throughout our sixth grade year and I got to know you fairly well. Moving on to middle school, we had our "dating" weeks and man even at that age you made my heart go crazy. But we didn't really know what we were doing but who does at that age? Once we decided to just be friends, we really grew close. We'd walk together in the halls and meet at each others lockers and talk about as much as we could before the bell rung. You became my sunshine. You were the one person who really understood me and stood by me through everything. You helped me with my relationships and helped me get a view of how boys think and act. You had impacted my life so much. When we weren't hanging out in person, we were texting each other. The years went on and our friendship grew into something so big, I thought there was no way in hell that it could ever end. That fear started to come true once you had told me your family was moving. My heart sunk and I didn't want to believe it at first. I had to be strong for you and believe that we were going to make it through whatever hard situations were thrown at us. The days went on and we made sure to make everyday together a good one because soon we wouldn't have that chance. And the day came that you left. It was during summer vacation. We continued to stay in contact and kept our friendship strong. The first day was a rough one as I had to walk into it without seeing your smile. We texted and talked about your new school an how you felt about it and how my school was. I had to believe that we could do this. Months went by and the fear came true. You turned into a different person. You let the girls at your school bash me for being such good friends with you as they smothered you with affection. It hurt to not have you stand up for me. If you're not going to , who is? We had minimal communication for a few months after that as every conversation ended with a snarky comment or characteristics that weren't recognizable with the person I knew. I laid in bed night after night wondering what I was doing wrong and how I could fix this and get my best back. It came to the day my dog passed away. I was crushed. I wasn't ready for him to go. I needed you. But you were no where to be seen. Not even a text was received. It stung. I loved you with all my heart and I didn't know why I wasn't good enough to be getting that from you anymore. I decided to message you one day and tell you i missed you. This was followed with a text saying "sorry". And that was when it hit me. You weren't the person I loved anymore. You never realized what was wrong and what was going on. It was time for me to let go whether I was ready to or not. And it hurts to see that you don't realize how you've changed. I wished you the best with life and you replied with the same response. I get it. It didn't hurt you as much as it hurt me because you never really cared and that's okay because you don't have to pretend anymore. I know this is going to hurt for a while but I can't do it anymore. It may take weeks or it may take months but its best that we leave each other in the past. I hope you accomplish everything you want to in life and I hope you have a beautiful family one day. I hope you can reconcile on our memories and tell your kids stories about us. I hope life treats you well and I wish you nothing but the best. And everything has to end with a goodbye.

love, the person who wanted best for you

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