Over the past few years, I've learned what it's like to lose friends and to learn to find love within myself. Graduating at seventeen is a hard thing, you're in an awkward stage of not being an adult but wanting to be taken seriously in the real world. I learned through graduating at such a young age what it's like to mature and really take authority over my life such as getting a job and taking online college classes. During this process, I lost many friends who chose not to associate with me cause I was preparing my life for adulthood when they were still young and wanting to party. As someone with severe social anxiety, I've never been a party person, sadly, that meant I had little to no friends, especially since my school was also very small and lacked people my age.
I cherished the friends I had in high school, every one of them, but, I learned that sometimes in order to move forward you can't have anything holding you back, that includes people you've loved over the years. This isn't an apology to the friends I lost because I shouldn't have to be sorry for making my dreams reality, I shouldn't have to cater to your likes and interest just because you don't like or value mine. I am truly happy with the person I am today and where my life is headed and I'm very happy to have the support system I do standing behind me.
Leaving behind these people definitely left me lonely, but I soon came to know the lovely world of writing and self-worth. Writing for The Odyssey is an amazing opportunity I'm happy to have and reading others articles and having lots of time to spend with God has truly given me a better outlook on life and what to do if I start feeling the weight of the world coming down. I'm happy to finally be free of my past and to see my bright future.
During the past few months, I learned a lot about true friends and who they really were. It's never easy having to let people go, but sometimes you have to for your own mental health. Dealing with my own mental health is challenging in itself, but having someone around who pushes you beyond your limits makes life so much harder than it needs to be. I'm very happy that every day I have something to turn to; Prayer.
God has put tests in my life that have helped strengthen me as a person. Some of the tests hurt and caused a lot of heartbreak, but I learned that God would not give me something I couldn't handle. He puts these tests in our life to bring us closer to Him. Without running to him with every need and victory I have I would not be who I am today. He is building an amazing life for me, even if I lost a few people along the way. God knows best, trust in Him always and you shall be blessed.