Academia is back in full swing, and second semester woes are upon us. Term papers, presentations, conferences, and a general sense of inadequacy. For many of us who expect to graduate at the end of this semester, those woes are coupled with dread for the upcoming change, uncertainty, and constant, crushing doubt.
Fear has a way of catching you off guard: you feel it first as unease, and then panic seizes you. The graduation frenzy started that way for me. Emails from the registrar's office reminding me to apply for graduation ushered in the first wave. Then I started filling out grad school applications, searching job boards, and trying to figure out how the transition from full-time student to normal, working adult would affect my insurance. My palms started to sweat every time I remembered my student loans. Around that time, I started asking myself questions: Was it worth it? Will my diploma ever be more than a decoration on my wall? Will I make it?
The last question in that list -- the one I still ask -- is harder to answer than the others. One, I'm not a prophet. I don't know the answer. Two, what does it mean to make it? Western culture has a set of criteria, typically involving money and social status, that will determine success if you let it. Most people are aware of this, consciously or subconsciously; most people are also aware that a one-size-fits-all image of success doesn't work for individuals.
A lot of the fear surrounding graduation (and other milestones) stems from societal pressure to be successful. Success is as ambiguous as the American Dream, and too often it's defined on someone else's terms. So, here is my tip for college students or anyone preparing to cross one of life's many thresholds: make your standards. Take some time and devise your own rubric for success.
Naive as I am, I'm waiting for the day we stop measuring the worth of education by material success. You can try to measure education by opportunity and experience, but even that's too narrow. Education does too much for us. It opens doors to new ventures and imparts understanding that no one -- no bank or judge -- can take away.
Waves of graduation frenzy will keep coming. May will come quickly, and soon I'll be walking across a stage, reaching for a few handshakes and my diploma. The diploma won't guarantee a high-paying job or even a stable career, but it is a green light to move forward. It's a chance to move on, leave a familiar town, and live a good life on my terms.
