I'm The ‘Long Term Relationship Girl’, And I Learned A Lot By Taking A Year Off Dating
Start writing a post
Relationships

I'm The ‘Long Term Relationship Girl’, And I Learned A Lot By Taking A Year Off Dating

It takes a strong person to remain single in a world that is accustomed to settling with anything just to say they have something.

385
I'm The ‘Long Term Relationship Girl’, And I Learned A Lot By Taking A Year Off Dating
Pixabay

I have forever been that girl. That girl who spent most of her time in long-term relationships. That girl who always had a partner, even when the man was less than worthy. That girl who couldn't seem to realize that all she needed was herself.

I did not wake up one day and just decide, "Oh, hey, I'm going to give up dating for a year."

No, that is not how it happened. I did know that I wanted to give myself time to truly heal the scars from my past. However, the time frame was just something that happened.

When you are not that concerned or seeking someone to share your life with, it's surprising how clear your vision truly is.

Let's be honest, dating in society today is much like a miniature train wreck. Girl meets boy, boy meets girl, things appear to be going great and suddenly out of nowhere it all just stops.

That was something I no longer wanted to go through and in the process of not "dating" I gained the knowledge of better things.

1. Time Heals All Wounds, And It Heals Them Better.

We all know the saying, the one we dread to hear after a breakup: that time will heal your wounds. We are told this over and over again. We hear the words ringing in our ears, but the pain in our hearts makes it seem as if it is almost unbelievable, and at first, it is. I learned that you have to be accepting of the time that passes, and you have to fight with the time, not against it. You have to want to heal, to grow and to conquer.

2. You Learn The True Value Of Friendships.

I have also been that girl. That girl who has put her friendships on the back burner once or twice. It becomes so easy to be so wrapped up in this thing we call love we forget about the friends that loved us long before our partner did. Sure, it's great to have someone to hold you at night. Someone to share the good and the bad with. Someone to stand by your side. But, when you neglect the people that were there for you prior to your relationship, who will be standing by your side to wipe your tears and to remind you just who the hell you are?

3. Solitude Can Be A Little Piece Of Heaven.

For as long as I can remember, I never liked being alone. I felt as if I always had to have someone by my side and that maybe it was the company I kept that made me happy. I learned that I could not have been more wrong. I like that now when I walk in the door from work I can relax for 45 minutes with no one talking. I like that I can choose to stuff my face with birthday cake Oreos, popcorn and all the junk food that I want while watching my Lifetime movies and "The Bold Type" with no judgment at all. Did you know that when you are single that the dirty clothes actually end up in the dirty clothes basket and not beside it? My toilet seat is never left up, and there is no one to talk back!

4. You Learn What You Truly Want Out Of A Partner.

You always think you know. We at least want to think that we have good taste when it comes to giving our heart to another person, but often, we settle. We settle mostly because we allow our heart to make the decision, ignoring the big red flashing sign that screams NO NO NO. It is true that you have to accept the bad with the good, but under no circumstances should we sacrifice our beliefs or expectations when choosing a partner. Get over the fact that he may not have the biggest package in the world, but turn and walk the other way if he thinks it's okay to entertain multiple women or is too emotionally unavailable.

5. Self-Discovery.

Self-discovery. And more self-discovery. Day by day, week by week and month by month I learned more about myself. I realized what I wanted out of life for myself. I chased my dreams. I faced quite a few of my fears, and I conquered every battle on my own. I took the time to truly focus on myself for once without any interference. I now know that when the right man comes along that I will be ready for him. Ready to add to his life and ready to accept what he has to add to mine.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
the beatles
Wikipedia Commons

For as long as I can remember, I have been listening to The Beatles. Every year, my mom would appropriately blast “Birthday” on anyone’s birthday. I knew all of the words to “Back In The U.S.S.R” by the time I was 5 (Even though I had no idea what or where the U.S.S.R was). I grew up with John, Paul, George, and Ringo instead Justin, JC, Joey, Chris and Lance (I had to google N*SYNC to remember their names). The highlight of my short life was Paul McCartney in concert twice. I’m not someone to “fangirl” but those days I fangirled hard. The music of The Beatles has gotten me through everything. Their songs have brought me more joy, peace, and comfort. I can listen to them in any situation and find what I need. Here are the best lyrics from The Beatles for every and any occasion.

Keep Reading...Show less
Being Invisible The Best Super Power

The best superpower ever? Being invisible of course. Imagine just being able to go from seen to unseen on a dime. Who wouldn't want to have the opportunity to be invisible? Superman and Batman have nothing on being invisible with their superhero abilities. Here are some things that you could do while being invisible, because being invisible can benefit your social life too.

Keep Reading...Show less
houses under green sky
Photo by Alev Takil on Unsplash

Small towns certainly have their pros and cons. Many people who grow up in small towns find themselves counting the days until they get to escape their roots and plant new ones in bigger, "better" places. And that's fine. I'd be lying if I said I hadn't thought those same thoughts before too. We all have, but they say it's important to remember where you came from. When I think about where I come from, I can't help having an overwhelming feeling of gratitude for my roots. Being from a small town has taught me so many important lessons that I will carry with me for the rest of my life.

Keep Reading...Show less
​a woman sitting at a table having a coffee
nappy.co

I can't say "thank you" enough to express how grateful I am for you coming into my life. You have made such a huge impact on my life. I would not be the person I am today without you and I know that you will keep inspiring me to become an even better version of myself.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

97252
college students waiting in a long line in the hallway
StableDiffusion

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments