About a year and a half ago, I decided to go natural. For those of you who aren’t Black or well versed in Black hair culture, let me explain. Natural can mean different things to different people but for me going natural meant no more relaxers. A relaxer is a chemical treatment used to straighten hair, typically applied once every six to eight weeks. I had been getting relaxers for as long as I could remember. So long in fact that I had no idea what kinds of curls I had hiding under there. One day I decided I didn’t want to schedule another and that I would be going natural.

My decision to go natural seemed like a fairly simple one but going natural is more complex than it seems on the surface. It may appear to be an obvious and logical choice to allow your hair to grow from your head as it naturally would but for Black men and women, this can be a radical and, in some people’s eyes, political choice. For as long as Black people have inhabited this country, our hair has been a part of our identity that’s been stripped from us. We have been told for so many years, decades, centuries that our hair in its natural state is untidy, unclean, unprofessional and out of the ordinary. As a result, Black people, women especially, have been assimilating to Eurocentric beauty standards and chemically straightening our hair to fit in. So, to choose to allow it to grow naturally and freely is seen, even in this day, as an act of boldness and deep self-acceptance. This is not to say that women who wear relaxers don’t accept themselves. The point is to have the choice to do either, not to do one simply out of fear of rejection.

I am not quite finished with my journey to natural as I chose to transition instead of doing a Big Chop. For those of you who might not know the difference, to Big Chop is to cut off all of the relaxed ends and begin working solely with your natural hair and to transition is to blend the two textures until you’re comfortable enough with the length to chop off the relaxed ends. Some people transition for months, others transition for years. The choice is up to you. To Big Chop right away or to choose to transition is really the choice of the person going natural. I decided to transition in order to keep my length while I wait for my natural hair to grow. Both options have their pros and cons. I would say the biggest pro for transitioning so far has been keeping my length and the biggest con has been blending. At first, it was easy to blend my two textures, relaxed, straight, thin and limp versus the little bit of thick, full, tightly curled natural hair. However, as time has gone on my curls are growing and becoming more abundant making it that much more difficult.

In transitioning, one of the most important keys to growing out healthy curls is protective styling. Protective styles are styles that include little manipulation, as to avoid breakage and minimal to no heat (heat can cause damage to any hair but especially curly hair). Protective styles include braids, weaves, wigs, twists, flexi-rods and so many more. I’ve dabbled in box braids, flexi-rods and buns for the most part and I have been lucky enough to work somewhere that allows these hairstyles. While Black men and women have been taking control and wearing their hair however each person sees fit, this doesn’t mean everyone is so accepting. Some workplaces and even schools still hold on to the old and unfair beauty standards that deem black hairstyles as unprofessional and untidy. There have been people fired or not hired in the first place for having afros, dreadlocks or braids. There are even schools that prohibit natural and protective hairstyles. Recently, a school in South Africa has been making headlines. In a country that has a majority Black population, young Black girls are banned from wearing their natural hair.

During my transition, I have worn my hair curly by using flexi-rods to shape my curls and blend my textures. While I have been thoroughly enjoying my curls, there is one thing I could do without: people asking to touch my hair. One of the downfalls of having been pressured into assimilating and wearing my hair straight is that when people see my curls, their curiosity goes through the roof. I have had multiple people ask to touch much hair and worse, there have been a few who have just reached out and touched it. Gentle reminder, just because someone's hair looks different doesn’t mean they’ve become part of a human petting zoo. I’ve never understood the urge to touch someone’s hair, especially without permission. Consent applies to more than just sexual encounters.

While I still have a few months until I Big Chop, this journey has already taught me so much. I’ve become more in-tune with the history of Black hair in America. I have felt frustration when trying to learn to deal with hair I had not worked with and liberation in accepting a part of myself I repressed for so long. My hope is that this movement in natural hair becomes a moment in history that shows Black people becoming a little freer in this country. I also hope this allows others to embrace a part of themselves that they may be masking. My hair had been relaxed so long that I didn’t even know what my own curls looked like and now growing them out has given me a new appreciation for my hair, my culture and my individuality. Long live kinks and curls.