So, I got to school with my boyfriend of three years and a common question I get asked is, "Oh, do you live together?" to which I say "No." People usually follow up with, "Do you plan to?" to which I also say — wait for it — "No." Now, don't take that as me saying that I don't love him or I don't see a future — because I do. It's more that I love my independence and ability to still be able to close my door and just be alone for awhile.
My boyfriend is great. He is sarcastic, intelligent, and so much fun to be around, but the boy drives me up a wall, and I'm sure he would say the same about me. We aren't even 20 yet, and we are still so immature. Sure, the idea of living together sounds nice because it's like a permanent sleepover, but I'm not ready for that. I'm still trying to figure out myself and find my own way in the world. I need to work on myself as an individual before I work on myself in a partnership.
I have goals and aspirations and an education that will always come first to me. My relationship is important, but it does not trump everything else in my life. I feel like a lot of people my age forget that life does not have to be all about finding someone and settling down — unless of course that's what you want, which is cool. That's just not for me and that's a concept that some people can't seem to grasp.
My parents lived together in college because they knew what they wanted. They knew they were going to get married and so they finished school together and built our family, so I see that side of life. I see that people do find exactly what they want out of life in college or even in high school and that's it for them. That's not a bad thing, in fact, I envy people who find that right away, but I just don't have it all figured out yet. Heck, I can't even pick a minor or decide if I want to double major!
I like to think that I'll be with my boyfriend forever, but I'm not counting on that. Obviously, I'm not going through my life constantly thinking about ending us or wasting my time on him because I do see a future, but no one knows anything for sure, and I'm so grateful that he's on the same boat as me.
So for everyone that always asks: No, I don't want to live with my boyfriend in college.
We are both content and happy living in separate places with our friends and working through school with support from each other, but we're just not ready to live together. It's a big step, and I'd rather take it when we are both as sure as we can be about what we want in life. We are young and free and we are going to take our time and appreciate that before we have to be real adults.