Yet again, I struggled finding a topic to write about this week. During the week, I wasn’t thinking about writing an article. No, I was thinking about the hours I have to work, the homework that is due tomorrow, and how I can’t run without feeling so much pain. My week was stressful enough, why would I want to think about just another added activity. I put it off until the very last day and I still struggled to find the appropriate topic. I kept thinking and thinking and then I walked into my room. My floor was barely visible, my bed full of clothes that I hadn’t folded from the previous week. It was a wreck! I had discovered my topic: how to clean your room. Just kidding, as I looked in my room I thought to myself, man I am busier than heck and I don’t have time to clean this let alone the energy. Why is life so difficult to manage sometimes?
Earlier in the day my dad had given me a call just to check in and see how I was doing. He called at 11:00 in the morning. Usually, I would have been up and chipper but I found that I had gone back to bed after eating breakfast. I answered and he said, “You sound tired.” He was right. I was exhausted and not ready to do anything. I agreed that I was tired and he responded, “Good that means that you are living life.” What an interesting statement, I thought to myself. My tiredness meant that I was living life? I really felt like I was just being lazy and unable to do other things that I wish that I could do.
My conversation with my dad started a spark. As I looked around all of the different areas of my life I realized that I am extremely busy. I was trying to soak up every last drop that life had to offer without recognizing it. That spark put so many things into perspective. It helped me to understand that I am human and I am only capable of doing so many things at one time.
Sometimes I neglect that fact and try to do things that I may not be capable of and then get mad at myself when I can’t. However, now I question why I get mad? I mean I am living life. I never take a step back to look at my life and how full it truly is.
When I do take that step back, I understand my life better. I take it one step at a time without letting other things get in this way. I am able to see that I am living my life and doing the most that I can. My dad was right. Sometimes I can’t clean my room. Sometimes I have to wait till the last minute to get things done. This doesn’t mean that I’m lazy. It means that I have something to live for and that I have a full life. I’d rather have a messy life than a life that I can’t enjoy.
