A few years ago, I wrote myself a letter with a detailed list of things to remember to do or tell myself. Every so often I would find this letter out of sheer coincidence and take these reminders to heart, as was the intent when I wrote them. Luckily for me, in this stressful time with finals coming up, the letter has found its way to me once again, but this time I would like to impart some of the wisdom I bestowed upon myself:
Calm down. There will be times where the weight of the world presses you down, but not everything is really as stressful and scary as it seems. If a situation is frustrating you and causing you distress, step back and de-stress. Take a walk, give yourself a Netflix break. The world can only push you to your limit if you let it.
Trust other people. Not everyone will be out to get you and it will be okay to branch out and make friends with people you’re not familiar with. Just because people are new doesn’t mean that they are evil and have hidden agendas. Get out of your comfort zone, at least every once in awhile.
Be brave. You have to stop standing by and holding your tongue when you are uncomfortable. If someone says or does something you don’t agree with, let them know. You may feel like people will hate you, but they will respect you for your honesty and for standing by what you believe. If they don’t, they are not people worth impressing.
Do what you want, other people’s opinions do not matter. College is the time to do the things you’ve wanted to do. Get that tattoo, get that piercing, dye your hair. If it makes you happy, you should do it. The number one thing to remember is that if you feel good about it, no one else should make you feel bad about it. No one will care or laugh at you.
Call your parents/visit home. College may keep you busy, or maybe you’re at odds with your family. But it’s important to forgive people and connect with the people you know care about you. If you’re having a hard time, call home for some advice or just to chat. Even if you only have a few minutes between classes, just call and let your family know you’re thinking of them.
Keep doing the things you love. Your hobbies are the things that keep you happiest, so keep doing those. Maybe you won’t get a career in writing or dancing or singing, but that’s no reason to give them up or to be discouraged. If you love it, never let that passion die. You’ll need these things to keep you sane, I promise.
Don’t be afraid to ask for help. There are going to be times when you feel weak and it is okay to need help. Remember that asking for help is not a weakness, but rather a skill. This extends to more than just mental health. If someone offers to help you with something, you should let them try. You can solve issues faster this way and you could make a new friend.
This list has kept me grounded for the last couple of years, casually reminding me of great life lessons I need to keep in mind. I know it’s a help for me, so I hope that if you stumble upon this every so often, it’ll help you out too.
