It is that refreshing time of year again, where we get to symbolically start anew after a night of gallivanting around town looking both inebriated and fabulous with our favorite partners in crime. We utilize all of this raw excitement to create lists and goals that, lets face it, die a quick and indifferent death by syllabus week.

Don’t get me wrong, I am all about self improvement and new beginnings. However I believe that there is a quiet dignity in conquering small, and often overlooked feats. We need to acknowledge that as busy students, young professionals, and just general human beings we can only do so much to change ourselves so rapidly. Here is a list of the seemingly mundane New Year’s Resolutions that any degree of slacker can appreciate.

1. Try to wear real pants twice a week… or at least put in a more creative effort when fabricating a justification for your lounge wear.
2. Do more of this 
   
3. Or maybe just this 
4. Takeout is expensive, resolve to cook more. Microwave pot pies do not count.
5. That being said, make grocery shopping lists. Stop sending yourself into the battlefield blind.
6. Shave yourself before your leg hair puts its own twist on Jumanji.
7. Answer it. 

   

8. Stop downloading app store games to artfully procrastinate.

9. Remember birthdays… or maybe just be sure to set alarm reminders.

10. Give it the good old college try. 

11. I am genuinely proud of you for learning how to use the George Foreman, but if you resolve to work that bikini over spring break, lay off the quick fix grilled cheeses.

12. They are not going anywhere…so a 3 day sink soak maximum.

13. “Due the 30th” does not mean you should resolve to actually start doing the assignment on the 30th. However the 29th gives you PLENTY of time.

14. Try to limit your Netflix usage. It is not a substitute for actual human interaction.

15. Resolve to get yourself some cute sneakers. Bribing yourself is one of the best means of motivation.

16. Go to class. Cold weather is not an excuse to skip. However rain is, pneumonia kills. 

17. The last and most important resolution? While using this annual milestone as an excuse to better yourself is tradition, it is by no means a reason to change who you are. Your friends and family may nag you about your lazy tendencies, and maybe you could use a nice swift kick in the rear every once in awhile. But it is likely that they enjoy your laid back approach to life and probably wouldn't have you any other way. Resolve to keep being yourself.

Cheers to the New Year and a (slightly) more productive you.