Ah yes, the lightweight. You know, that one friend who takes one shot and it goes right to their head? If you don't know who I'm talking about, YOU are probably the lightweight of your going-out group. Let all the lightweights emerge from their corners and bond over all these things we know to be true. Yes, I am the lightweight friend too!
You pay half as much as your friends do when you go out
This is probably the best part of being a lightweight. Just give me 2 shots and a mixed drink and I'm good for the next few hours.
You hit the midnight level of drunk around 9 p.m.
Yes, I can definitely tell when I'm already way drunker than all my friends because they start giving each other looks like, "Oh God, here she goes!"
Pre-gaming is just as intense as actually going out
You want me to drink how many shots?! That isn't a pre-game, that's endgame.
Driving is out of the question because your BAC is over the legal limit after one drink
Even the DD can have one drink, right? WRONG.
You know exactly how much alcohol is in every mixed drink so you don't accidentally go overboard
Long Island iced teas are a no no unless you want your stomach pumped.
Your hangovers are 10 times worse than anybody else's
I can literally feel my liver aching...
Casual drinks are never just casual drinks
Thursday night, half-price sangria gets you tipsy after one glass. It's just sad.
Wine tasting isn't even an option
It's like they don't want lightweights to enjoy the good things in life.
You can still feel the alcohol even if you get a drink with dinner
That Super Tiki Twister looks really great until I'm tipsy on a Wednesday at Texas Roadhouse during what was supposed to be a casual girl's night.
Drinking games are a no-go
I have played exactly one drinking game in my entire life and it ended up with me dropping a vodka cranberry all over myself and my boyfriend.
You always look the most rachet in every single group picture
I take pictures with friends on every night out and never actually post any. So basically, there is no evidence that I actually ever go out.
Nausea hits way too fast
Once I had maybe three or four drinks at a club and was in the bathroom for a solid half hour because I thought I was going to throw up. Fun night.
You have designated going out shoes because they always end up just as trashed as you
Oh, that stain? Yeah, that's from that one time I decided to chug an entire marg and then drop my next drink all over myself.
Your Snapchat stories are basically shaky videos of you screaming at your friends to chug their drinks
Why can't everyone else be on this level too, right?
You are the one already wanting to do crazy shit while the rest of your group isn't even tipsy yet
Come dance with me! Let's sing karaoke! Ohmygod, let's go get tattoos!
