As always, I was on my computer watching YouTube. One of the people I am subscribed to is Will Darbyshire. He is British, 22, and he's a content creator. I like his videos because of their aesthetic, their content, his drier sense of humor, and his wisdom. It’s rare to find a young person with an old soul. But when you find them, you hold on to the words they say, because they’re full of insight. He posted a video last week called 50. Fear. In the video, Will discussed his fear of failing, not knowing what he wants to do with his life, not living up to the successes of his friends, and having meltdowns when he doesn't performing to his personal standard. Here's the video:
Will addresses many of the fears I know I feel as a human. I am deathly afraid of failure, not living up to my own expectations, rejection, and my biggest fear is not being happy with what I decide to pursue. This six minute video got me thinking. Why do I fear what I fear? Why do I try to control everything in my life? The answer is always the same. It’s my lack of vulnerability.
As a culture, we lack vulnerability. Vulnerability by definition is: being susceptible to physical or emotional attack or harm. The definition is blunt and any normal person would ask why would I want to be vulnerable? Our culture puts a negative connotation around the word vulnerability. We tell ourselves from a young age that we have to be tough, and that we can’t let anyone or anything come between ourselves. We build up walls, we shut people out, and we’re our only source of knowledge because we close ourselves off from others.
So how do we become vulnerable? We have to open ourselves up, even though it’s hard. I can speak from my own experience and tell you that being more open to life unlocks doors you would not believe. So many more opportunities have been made available to me just from opening myself up and saying yes. How do we open ourselves up to our fears? You let them go. Even though the opportunity to fail is still there, you have take the chance! If failed, it becomes a lesson learned. If it’s a success, then fantastic! Happiness and joy come from putting yourself out there. Will says in his video that there is nothing wrong with being scared, and it's true. But, if you let your fears begin to run your life, there is a problem.
To leave you, I’ll say that opening yourself to new things will change you. It will make you more aware of your desires and your fear will not take precedent in your life. Opening yourself up will challenge you to do more and to be more. So be open, face your fears head on and live your life to the fullest.
