Deceiver, fabricator, fibber, false witness, perjurer, and prevaricator are all words that can be used to call somebody a liar. Pathological, compulsive, sociopathic, and occasional are all considered types of liars. Why, when, and how are all questions that come up when people are trying to understand a lie. I want to know if there is a true reason why people lie.

What I have grown to realize, and after reading a few studies, is that 78 percent of lies stem from people who are not happy with where they are in their life. Liars may feel as though they have not accomplished anything or that they are letting the people close to them down. 12 percent of lies are due to the fact that the person does not believe in themselves. You feel you have to "fake a life" just to get people to like you, which it does not work. The other 10 percent lie because they just do not know any different. They learned to lie from how they were raised. Before we cut liars off, it is good to understand why they are lying, so we are better able to help ourselves and them move forward.

Some people feel they may deserve more than they are getting right now. They feel they look bad or dumb for not being where "they should be." Their life feels unfulfilling. Most do not understand the process. The process is stronger or deeper than rushing to be something you are not. People should try to understand that the majority of lies are not meant to hurt anyone; in actuality, most lies happen to try to protect somebody from the painful truth. We cannot say that lying is okay because it never will be. Instead of becoming angry with the person and removing them from our lives, we should be offering help. When somebody lies, we say, “I can never trust them again." It is the boy who cried wolf syndrome. Many liars are essentially the boy who cried wolf. When we lie to the people we care about they begin to not trust us and consequently, when we need help, nobody will ever believe what we say. That is wrong. Lying is not right, but dismissing liars is not right either. As the saying goes, “Two wrongs don't make a right.”

We have to realize that when a person is having a hard time changing or being different that they are crying for help. They need somebody that can help them without judging them. Why is that we do not call a cheater a liar? Essentially, they have been dishonest the whole relationship, yet they often end up marrying the person they have cheated on. Cheaters and liars cannot be determined by the situation, we must treat them both the same. People who lie are just seeking something more than what they are currently receiving. They need somebody that can help them cope with whatever they are lacking. LIARS NEED HELP, not somebody to drift away and abandon them. Yes, liars still have to gain trust back and if they are truly a friend or someone you love, you should give them a chance to make it right. Some people need more than one chance in what they are doing because we are all human and we will always make mistakes.

So why are they lying? Because they need help, not somebody to judge them or cut them off. And if we are calling them friends or loved ones and we cut them off once they lie, do we truly care about them?

I was a liar. I could not rely on myself, nor could anyone else. My life went into a downward spiral and I felt I was not living. Nothing I did felt right and now I feel like a screw-up. I let down the people who cared about me the most. If I could get a second chance with every single one of those people I hurt, I would show them how much I was hurting. In turn, I would hope that through showing them, they would be able to understand and to forgive me. I did have one friend help me through all of this and I appreciate them for sticking with me and helping me instead of leaving me. Now that I'm better I want to help others that are going down the same path as me.

"I want to be better than I actually am. I feel I may have let down my whole family. You learn that you are not yourself, you cannot rely on yourself. I apologize to anyone that I may have hurt and I promise that if you give me a second chance, I will make things right. I needed help to understand the way of life. I could not be real and ended up stabbing myself in the back with a knife. The only way to come back from this is becoming a better person at heart. I wish I could go back to the beginning, when I introduced myself and realized that I didn't have to be the cool guy to get the girl. That I will have an impact in this world and I get to decide if it is good or bad. Please, forgive me soon and I will be back the second you do. Every friend I've ever had, including you, left. I love you to Pluto and back. Always." - Juss