Letting Go Of Your Relationship

Knowing When It Is Time To Let Go

Questions and thoughts you should consider in order to move on from someone you care for.

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Some people currently in relationships have a difficult time knowing when it is time to move on from their significant others, and some people pursuing relationships have a difficult time knowing when to no longer pursue a potential mate.

Human beings feel comfortable with what is familiar, so it would make sense that though you may want to leave a relationship, you have not done so yet.

You may be wondering if you are giving up too soon, and that may be true. But, if you have harbored these thoughts for a while, you may be doing a disservice to you and your partner.

You may wonder if there is anyone else out there for you, but it is possible to love again with another.

You may be afraid to leave, but is it not frightening to stay?

Is it not frightening to subject yourself to a relationship you have all but physically left already?

It is important to ask yourself these questions and contemplate these thoughts, because often people get in the way of themselves.


And if you are pursuing a particular person as a future mate and things do not seem to be heading in the direction you would like, maybe you should ask questions and muddle through some thoughts too.

No one should chase someone forever, because eventually you would lose breath.

It is important to gradually demonstrate interest and let your intentions known, but do not subject yourself to be let down constantly by a person you like. Confidence is key to courting and dating, but everyone is not for everybody.

You will come across people who like you, and people who do not. It is important to be aware of that when you are socializing with others, because you may find yourself changing yourself for others in a way that is unrecognizable to yourself.

You want to be careful not to invest too much time into someone who does not value you in the way you would like them to, because the investment may not pay out.

The road may be futile.

And if someone does not like you for you and all that you do, then does that person deserve you?

Does that person require your attention and consideration?

Is the chase worth chasing?

It is not easy to come to clear answers to these questions and thoughts, and if you are not used to practicing mindfulness and emotional regulation, you may not really get an answer. But, focus on what you can focus on. Control what you can control.

So, for example, focusing on the facts of your situation may bring clarity as to what you should do next.

There is no perfect time to decide about a relationship or a potential relationship. You have to hope that the decisions you do make at a particular time are the best ones for that moment, and hope that they will likely lead to better circumstances later.

Time is weird.

Try not to regret anything


But after reading this, you will eventually know when it is time to let go.

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To The Boy Who Will Love Me Next

If you can't understand these few things, leave before things get too involved
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To the boy that will love me next, I need you to know and understand things about me and my past. The things I have been though not only have shaped the person I’ve become, but also sometimes controls my life. In the past I’ve been used, abused, and taken for granted, and I want something real this time. The guys before you were just boys; they didn’t know how to treat me until it was too late. They didn’t understand how to love me, until I broke my own heart. Before you truly decide to love me I want you to understand these things.

When I tell you something, please listen.

I’m my own person, I want to be loved a certain way. If I ask you to come over and watch movies with me please do it, if I ask for you to leave me alone for a few hours because it’s a girl’s night please do it. I don’t just say things to hear my own voice, I say things to you because it’s important to my life and the way I want to be loved. I’m not a needy person when it comes to being loved and cared for, but I do ask for you to do the small things that I am say.

Forgive my past.

My past is not a pretty brick road, it is a highway that has a bunch of potholes and cracks in it. I have a lot of baggage, and most of it you won’t understand. But don’t let my past decided whether you want to love me or not. My past has helped form who I am today, but it does not define who I am. My past experiences might try and make an appearance every once in a while, but I will not go back to that person I once was, I will not return to all that hurt I once went though. When I say those things, I’m telling the complete and honest truth. I relive my past every day, somethings haunt me and somethings are good reminds. But for you to love me, I need you to accept my past, present and future.

I’m just another bro to the other guys.

I have always hung out with boys, I don’t fit in with the girl groups. I have 10 close girlfriends, but the majority of my friends are guy, but don’t let this scare you. If I wanted to be with one of my guy friends I would already be with him, and if you haven’t noticed I don’t want them because I’m with you. I will not lose my friendships with all my guy friends to be able to stay with you. I will not cut off ties because you don’t like my guy friends. I have lost too many buddies because of my ex-boyfriends and I promised myself I wouldn’t do that again. If you don’t like how many guy friends I have you can leave now. Don’t bother trying to date me if you can accept the fact I’m just another bro.

I might be a badass, but I actually have a big heart.

To a lot of people I come off to be a very crazy and wild girl. I will agree I can be crazy and wild, but I’m more than that. I’m independent, caring, responsible, understanding, forgiving, and so such more type of woman. Many people think that I’m a badass because I don’t take any negatively from anyone. Just like we learned when we were younger, “if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say it at all.” Most people can’t do that in today’s world, so I stick up for myself and my friends. I don’t care what anyone thinks about me, or their option on how I live my life. The only thing I care about is being able to make myself happy. Even though I’m an independent woman, understand that I do have a big heart. Honesty when I truly care for someone I will do just about anything they ask, but don’t take advantage of this. Once you take advantage of this part of me, all respect will be lost for you.

I’m hard to love.

Sometimes I want to be cuddle and get attention, and sometimes I don’t want you to talk to me for a couple hours. Sometimes I want you to take me out for a nice meal, but sometimes I want a home cooked meal. Every day is different for me, sometimes I change my mind every hour. My mood swings are terrible on certain days, and on those days you should probably just ignore me. I’m not easy to love, so you’ll either be willing to find a way to love me, or you’ll walk out like so many others have.

I’m scared.

I’m scared to love someone again. I’ve been hurt, heartbroken, and beat to the ground in my past relationships. I want to believe you are different, I want to hope things will truly work out, but every relationship has always ended up the same way. I’m scared to trust someone, put my whole heart into them, just to be left and heartbroken again. I sick and tired of putting my whole body and soul into someone for them to just leave when it is convenient for them. If you want to love me, understand it won’t be easy for me to love you back.

When “I’m done.”

When I say “I’m done” I honestly don’t mean that I’m done. When I say that it means I need and want you to fight for me, show me why you want to be with me. I need you to prove that I’m worth it and there’s no one else but me. If I was truly done, I would just walk away, and not come back. So if I ever tell you, “I’m done,” tell me all the reasons why I’m truly not done.

For the boy who will love me next, the work is cut out for you, you just have to be willing to do it. I’m not like other girls, I am my own person, and I will need to be treated as such. For the boy that will love me next, don’t bother with me unless you really want to be with me. I don’t have time to waste on you if you aren’t going to try and make something out of us. To the boy who will love me next, the last thing I would like to say is good luck, I have faith in you.

Cover Image Credit: Danielle Balint

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I love Odyssey for so many reasons and here is why I stay

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I started writing for Odyssey at my old school back in the way beginning of Spring 2018. It's been a little over a year of love and support and I wouldn't change that for anything. I applied to write for Odyssey way back when because I've always had a passion for writing and getting my voice out there.

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