Dear _____’s future husband,
First thing’s first, let me start by saying congratulations on finding your soul mate. You must know, though, that she was my soulmate first and will always be the Cristina Yang to my Meredith Grey. I’m sure you already know that without a doubt, she is an amazing and extraordinary girl. She deserves nothing but the best, even though she has days that aren’t so extraordinary and amazing. It is important for you to know that if she is having one of these days, it is most likely because she isn’t just angry and hungry; she has reached the top of her “hangry” meter and will remain this way until she is fed. Whatever you do, do not let her “hangry meter” burst. This is probably the most important tip that you should know and learn, but it is my duty as her person to let you in on a few more secrets.
You didn’t just say “I do” to her -- you said it to me too.
Do not forget that on the days that her “hangry meter” is fine, she might have another meter that is maxed out. Some days, you may not know which one broke. It is important for you to be the one who can help her through rough times, but it is also important for you to know that sometimes, she needs me. So, if you happen to accidentally walk in on the two of us snuggling and eating a tub of homemade chocolate chip cookie dough, don’t worry; it’s exactly what it looks like. There will be times when I steal your wife and you will need to be okay with that. Remember, you married both of us.
Sometimes she can have quite the attitude.
Based on pure experience, I know that similar to Cristina, her attitude can be a little annoying. When she has an attitude, tell her. Let her know that she can’t talk to you like that because she’s hungry and has a headache. Go to the medicine cabinet, grab her some Tylenol, and tell her to suck it up. Trust me, she will fall asleep and everything will be dandy when she wakes up. Unless you wake her up for something stupid… don’t do that. Lord, don’t do that.
She has a rare heart and you should treat it like it’s gold.
Yes, sometimes she has an attitude. Like me, you must learn to look past the few times that she shows it. I fell in love with my best friend for the heart that she has, and I’m sure you married her for the same reason. She isn’t always an emotional person. This is something you will have to pry out of her on some days. It is very important that you do this because she needs to know that you love her. She needs to see your heart too. Unlike many people, she has a heart that doesn’t give up too easily. Trust me, I know this because, after many years, she has yet to give up on my BS. She will put up with yours too if you promise to put up with hers. You must show her that you will, even through the rough times. My best friend deserves that.
She will be an amazing mother.
If for any reason she tells you that she is scared to have kids, let her be scared… but whatever you do, don't let her miss out on being a mom. I’m sure you already know how awesome she is at being a wife. Make sure you are there to see how extraordinary she will be as a mother. Be sure not to pressure her if she isn’t ready, but wait with her until she is. I promise that you will not regret it.
You will have to be best friends with my husband too.
There will be cookouts. There will be Super Bowl parties and chilli that you will have to pretend to like. If you are anything like my best friend, you won’t care much about football. The man that I marry will probably be a grill-master, so there will be times that you will need to stand next to the hamburgers with him and talk about guy stuff. We will be spending a lot of time together. Remember, she is my person. The two of you will be in our lives forever, so you should probably ignore all of the annoying things my husband does and buddy up with him.
If you hurt her, you’ve got another thing coming.
I may not look like much, but hurting my best friend is more than enough of an incentive to toughen up really quick. There will never be a time when I don’t have her back. She might not tell me absolutely everything about your marriage, but I will always know. A best friend always knows. Trust me when I say that I will use that against you if I so need to.
I can’t wait to meet you.
I don’t know your name or where you will come from, but I do know one thing for sure. If my best friend is spending the rest of her life with you, you must be a pretty awesome dude. Thank you for being her happiness.
