You know who you are, and I wish to keep you anonymous, so I'm not going to start this out like any typical letter.

I am very confused when it comes to my emotions, but I had never had someone make me so happy and sad at the same time. I was good at keeping my feelings under the surface until you came along, and that messed with my head. I fought a lot of demons throughout the course of what was going on, and sometimes you did nothing but fuel the fire. I battled with myself daily because I couldn't figure out how to be good enough. I struggle with trust, and I took it out on you. I jumped to conclusions.

My mental state dropped to unhealthy levels, I hated who I had become but I couldn't stop myself. I thought I was feeling love, but it wasn't love by any means. Talking became a chore, conversations became arguments, bliss became regret. Through all off the bad that happened, sometimes you were good for me.

You taught me that boys can actually like you for your personality rather than physical traits, you taught me that people can grow together, you taught me how to change. I tried my best to change my ways when you were in the equation because I thought that was the deal breaker, I get better and things would work out just fine. We taught each other how to be better people.

No matter where we go in life, I will always have so much love for you. Years later, we are back as freshman. Hours apart. We have grown and get along better than we have in awhile. Our bests concurred our worsts. Thank you for being the best and worst thing that has happened to me.

-xoxo