Dear My High School Self,
High school was a very rough time for you and I wish you didn’t have to feel like you were alone through it all. I've learned that someone was always there even when you felt like you were completely alone in the world. I wish you never had to look in the mirror and feel completely disgusted with how you looked. I wished you never felt so depressed that you thought taking your own life would solve everything. It doesn’t solve anything and I'm glad you found the strength not to go through with it. I just wish you didn’t have to feel so alone throughout those years, because people really do love and care for you. I wish you didn’t think you felt that people wouldn’t like you if you talked to them. There are so many friends that you could have had, but you were too scared to start a conversation with them because you didn’t feel pretty or cool enough.
I really wish you didn’t get so stressed that your eczema flared up and you had to deal with all the questions and stares. I wish you knew that it was OK to be yourself. Young girls are in the midst of so much change in these times and they all deserve to feel like they are worth something. Feeling worthy is hard because it's a natural reaction for girls to not feel good enough but everyone is good enough at being themselves. Girls are taught not to be themselves because they want everyone to look and think the same and being different is considered weird. That’s why we are given makeup and told that it will make us prettier from such a young age. Young woman should not feel like they have to wear makeup in order to feel pretty. I wish that you didn’t feel like wearing makeup would make you prettier.
It's hard when you switched schools for high school and had no friends but I hope you know that you will graduate with the best friends of your life. Never feel inferior about your art because you are talented and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. You will feel more confident as the years go by in your art and you will learn how to show it to the world. I hope that you look around and cherish the friends you make along the way. I hope you don't choose a boy over them but you still will. One day, people will notice you for the person you really are and it will feel amazing.
I know it feels like all you do is wake up and go to this place where no one knows your name and you feel like a complete loser, but just wait a little longer. You will find that all these things you are feeling will make you wiser, and stronger in everything you do. Let yourself fall in love and let yourself feel hurt even if you feel completely shattered by it. Take risks and capture memories because these years go by so quickly. Most importantly, I hope you know that it's okay not to be okay. It's okay to ask for help sometimes and it may lead you to a much bigger discovery in yourself, which is that it's okay to be different.
Sincerely,
Your College Self
