Dear Past Self,
How are you? Are you doing ok? I just want to tell you to take a deep breath and that everything is going to work out fine. But actually...it is. You may feel like you have no idea what’s going on, or how college is going to go or even where you want to go to college. On the other hand I know you have big plans for yourself, and then back up plan on top of back up plan if those don’t work out. But honestly, everything is going to work out. Truly, it will.
Three years ago, I never would have thought I would be where I am now, or be as happy as I am now, but it happened. High school is rough, senior year is especially rough and you’ll go through harder and more intense challenges between then and now, but you’ll get through it. I know you think it’s going to be hard to make friends in college and keep in touch with your high school friends, that classes are going to be hard and that you’re not actually prepared. However, only some of that is true. You’re going to keep in touch with your high school friends, maybe not as often as you want and maybe not even with the people you’d expect but some friendships last a lifetime and hang on to those who hang around. There are some amazing people in your life, don’t ever underestimate the power of small text “Hello.” Making friends in college also won’t be as hard as you think, I mean yeah it’s awkward and people come and go but open up and people will like you for who you are, not who you think you're supposed to be.
On another note, you may think your AP classes are hard now. You’re wrong. College classes, while not all of them are hard, they all take way more work than any class you ever took in high school. Be prepared to study, but learn how to actually study first. Go to office hours, I know it seems awkward and like you won’t know what to say, but you’ll feel a lot better when you actually understand the material and know the professor. You’re going to fail...literally.but you’re going to learn something in the process. Failing is ok. Dropping a class is ok. You’re not good at everything, no one is, and it’s ok to change you’re mind about what you want, what you like and who you are, it’s all part of growing up. Also, maybe try harder at math. I know you hate but you’re going to be taking a lot more of it later. Appreciate your high school teachers, they’re going to make a lasting impression on you later so remember to tell them you appreciate them.
Keep up your work ethic but also, learn to have fun. I know you’re super high stress and you have to get everything done on your checklist so that your entire life plan will work out, but really take a break once in awhile. Stay up late, go out with your friends, drive around your tiny town and bake brownies more often, because you’re going to miss it later. Also, not everything has to go one hundred percent according to plan. I know you think you want to go to vet school and that’s fine...but you’re going to change your mind, which will change your entire life plan. Learn to deal with it, you don’t have to plan out every detail of your life. Breathe.
Hug your parents. You’re going to miss them when you leave, more than you currently realize. They love you unconditionally. Truly. So tell them the truth and let them know you love them.
Honestly, take a deep breath, smile more, sleep well, go out on weeknights, and just generally live a little. You’re going to be fine so just enjoy the ride.