To the sport who made me who I am today, thank you and I miss you.
I'll never forget being 6 years old going to my first cheerleading practice. With a bow in my hair, Soffe shorts, and some old t-shirt, I never knew that this sport would be the one thing to change my life forever.
Any cheerleader will be able to tell you that there are days where she absolutely hated this sport. She did not want to get up and go to practice, or she did not want to throw her tumbling. But that's a part of any sport, you have up and down days with it. Through the countless injuries I experienced from this sport, I don't regret a single one. Every injury you put me through taught me how to be stronger, how to push through.
Thank you for giving me the most amazing teammates that turned into a family. The girls I was blessed with to call my teammates will have a place in my heart like no one else. I simply could not imagine my life without them. They showed me what it's like to unconditionally love someone that isn't blood. Your family has to love you, but the group of girls you placed in my life in doing the most dangerous sport, chose to love me through every tear I've shed, or smile I've had. Thank you for giving me the most honest version of myself, for giving me my identity. Thank you for showing me that some of the greatest moments come from when you don't think you've got any strength left in you. Thank you for teaching me that nothing worth while in life comes easily. You taught me the very definition of dedication, without it I most likely wouldn't be writing this letter today. You gave me chances to fight against the odds, and to stay strong through adversity. You gave me my backbone in life ... and also destroyed it.
I did not willingly give up cheerleading, I was forced to by my team of surgeons. Waking up after surgery and remember I can never step foot on a blue panel mat again was heartbreaking ... and still is to this day. Take it from me, a washed up damaged spinal cord cheerleader you will miss it. And you will give anything to have it just one more time.
You're going to miss your coaches yelling at you because you didn't point your toes, or because you went on two instead of four. You'll miss busting your tumbling pass at practice and having to do it again and again until its perfect. You'll miss the "one more time" from coach knowing its three more times. I promise you that a year later, you're going to miss not taking conditioning seriously.
You're going to miss the nervous pee, shaking hands, handshakes, and of course the hugs before walking on the mat at competition. You're going to miss the bright lights and the feel of the floor. You'll miss the going back stage and watching your video to see how the team did as a whole. You'll miss the embarrassing action shots, I promise. You're going to miss the circles during awards squeezing your teammates hands until they announce you in first.
You're going to miss the headache you got from you hair being pulled, teased, curled and pinned. You'll also miss how long it takes to take off competition makeup after a long day. You'll miss red lipstick, fake eyelashes, and glitter. Don't forget about the tight uniforms, sports bras, Nike pros, and Nfinity's.
You'll miss the talks you get from your coach, and you'll soon realize that those talks will help you get through your worst days in life. You'll miss always having someone to wipe your tears at the end of a bad practice, or a bad competition. You'll miss the support your coaches gave you when it came to a new skill. You'll miss the "I'm so proud of you" you get when you do your job perfectly.
You'll miss walking into the gym after a long day at school and being able to escape your problems. Being able to look around to the 20 plus girls that are constantly reminding you how amazing you are is a feeling that only we understand. You'll miss goofing off on the tumble track, or the laughs within the stunt group when a inside joke happened. You'll miss being excited when it's time to hear your music for the new season. And you may not think it now... You'll miss the double sessions.
You'll miss the competitions, the hotels, disney world, ESPN Wide World of Sports, the jackets, medals, bows, and shirts.
But most of all, you'll miss the the feeling of hugging your teammates after competing your routine. The adrenaline rush you get after knowing you gave it everything you had and it was enough. You'll miss knowing that no matter what happens in life, you have an escape called cheerleading.
My final words to you are that I hope you cherish every moment. I hope that when you remember the competition you lost, you remember that it wasn't the worst thing that ever happened to you. I hope you proved everyone wrong, and I hope you went about it in a respectful manner when you did. I hope you remember the butterflies you got before walking on the mat, there is nothing like that feeling. I hope you remember the time you lost Summit and thought it was the end of the world, because now you know it isn't. I hope you can make jokes about when you lost because you know you deserved it. You know you could've done better, and I hope you take those losses to push you to go the extra mile. I hope you give it everything you have, and regret nothing. I hope you smile and say that you're proud of yourself for your accomplishments. I hope you talk to your teammates everyday about the latest drama in your life, and never go out of touch. I hope you had the time of your life. And most importantly, I hope you learned that cheerleading is more than a sport, its a lifestyle.