Dear Older Self,
Who knows where you are right now. Maybe you are working with the Navy, or maybe you kicking butt in the FBI. I know what I want right now but I can’t control the future, so who knows what I end up doing. I just hope that whatever you, Future Me, are doing, that you are doing it because you want to and not because it was what was best at the time or because someone else told you to. I am writing this to give you advice from current me. It is important because in 15 or 20 years I think I am going to remember my college years differently than I do now. I hope you remember all the fun times we had in college; the late nights and the early mornings; the hard study sessions filled with encouragement from your friends; the times we loved and the times we hated. Most importantly, I want to give you the advice that your 20-year-old self feels you will need in the future. So here it goes.
First, I don’t know if you have kids yet but if you do or when you do, don’t spend all your time thinking you messed them up. I feel like every parent blames themselves for this at some point, but in reality you aren’t messing us kids up. If anything we are doing it on our own, but, hey — most of us still manage to turn out great.
Don’t take life too seriously because if you do you’ll probably end up messing something up. It kills me to see people who take life too seriously and miss out on all the fun. When you find yourself stressed and feeling anxious over life (and trust me you will), step back and take in the world around you.
Always take pictures of your family and friends. I don’t even care if pictures are no longer cool, I want you to do it. Don’t just take pictures at important events like birthdays, take pictures every time you do something fun. Recreate pictures of you as a kid with your own kids. Send them to mom because you know she will love it.
Never argue with someone you love for over an hour. Sixty minutes is all you get and then you are done, so you better get everything out before then. Never argue in front of other people or children, it makes everyone feel awkward.
Set aside time for you, just 15 minutes a day. Take this time to think about yourself and what you need. If I predict correctly you will be spending a lot of time thinking about others and helping them, which is what I hope you do but you also need to look out for yourself.
Try and not stay mad at someone for more than half a day. I know this will be hard because it is easier to stay mad then it is to forgive or work it out. I want to believe that everything can be worked out. Don’t let me be wrong.
My last piece of advice is to not let people affect you in a negative way. You are going to meet a lot of people in your life, and chances are you will not like every single one of them. Only stay around the people who have a positive effect on you. Your parents, siblings, and friends are always going to be a positive effect — even if it doesn’t seem like that all the time. Don’t ever let these people go, but you might meet some people who will not be good for you and you need to let them go. Don’t be stubborn about it, just do it.
That’s it, that is my advice to you. I hope this brings back lots of great memories for you. Memories of your family and friends and all the good times you had in your twenties. I am barely twenty now but I have a feeling it is going to be a great time for us. I just want to leave you with this; life happens and we cannot control it. We just have to take it day by day or if that’s too much maybe just take it hour by hour.
Love,
You
20 years old
