My parents always thought about having another child after I was born. I was just such an incredible gift they would’ve loved another one… Or else I was such a disaster that they wanted to try again. Regardless, my parents, especially my dad, were very interested in the idea of another bundle of joy around the house. Alas, because of personal family reasons, it was not to be.

I’ve spent most of my life wondering how different I would be if I had you, the sibling that could've been. A younger sibling – I could only dream of what you would've been like. Would you have been an adventurous brother who would play sports and video games with me, one who would be my competitive partner; or would you have been a sweet-hearted sister who would have helped me to become a more thoughtful and well-rounded individual?

I would have greatly benefited from having both a brother and a sister. I would have (hopefully) been worthy of being called an older brother. I would have protected you from fights or unwanted boyfriends/girlfriends. I would have imparted any advice I could think of, while also including the occasional prank or two. I would have always been there by your side, and you would be there with me.

But instead, I was the only child of the family, growing up in my own isolated world.

Growing up as an only child has certainly had its ups and downs. Of course, there were the usual positives that people connect to only children: I received all the attention from the family, finances were less stressful with only one child to worry about and there was no arguing with other siblings. I mainly interacted with people older than me, which caused me to mature more quickly than others my age.

However, these benefits came with their own downfalls.

At home, my companions were my dad (when he wasn’t at work), my grandmother (with a language barrier, since she was from South Korea) and whatever toys, books or video games I occupied myself with. Frankly, I was lonely.

I craved interactions with someone close to my age, someone who could embark on the same imaginary adventures I was always itching to begin. These are thoughts that consumed me when I was younger, my focus solely on all I was missing out on because I never had you, a sibling by my side.

Now, I’m at peace with the fact that you never came to be. Am I bummed still? Of course. But, there is no way I’d be the person I am today without growing up the way I did. I’ve been blessed with unique experiences because of the fact that I am an only child. I’m a rare breed, having an instant connection with the rare few who also happen to be only children.

Most noteworthy of all, I actually do have siblings now — at least, sort of. The friends in my life have become family to me, being the siblings I got to choose for myself. These brothers and sisters may not be related to me by blood, but they are without a doubt my family, people I would go to the ends of the world for.

I wanted siblings growing up, and I finally got them. My friends are the nameless brothers and sisters I’ve always wanted, and I thank each and every one of them. I never could have imagined it working out this way, but I’m sure glad it did.

With love,

Your overly-awkward-and-serious brother, Daniel