It's been about two years since my grandmother passed away. I still remember her beautiful laugh and how close she was with the Lord. She had ten children and many grandchildren and great-grandchildren. She started our family reunion almost 17 years ago, and we still celebrate it every year. She left such a huge legacy. Life just isn't the same without her here on earth with us. If I could write a letter up to heaven, this is what I would say.
Dear grandma,
I miss you. We all miss you. We all wish we could hear one of your stories again. I want to go back to the days where I would help you take care of your garden and you would let me eat the vegetables that we picked together. I want to go back to the days where you would take me to your church and sing so beautifully during the service. I want to swim with you in the pond again and watch the birds from the window with you again. We all miss the priceless memories that we got to share with you.
I'm glad you aren't suffering anymore. I remember walking all the way down the beach with you about 7 years before you went to heaven. During your last year on earth, we all noticed you were becoming more and more sick, and it was a drastic change from the times we used to walk long distances together. When you were diagnosed with cancer, we all felt the pain. When the treatments started to not work anymore, we just had a looming feeling of grief. I was with you on your last day on earth, and seeing how much pain you were in was almost too much to handle. I wasn't there the moment you passed away, but I came in shortly after. It was heartbreaking, but there was also a sense of peace. You were no longer suffering and your body was still. It looked as though you were just asleep.
Your memorial service was one of the hardest days of my life. You asked me to play a song for you, but when I started to play, I just couldn't. I was uncontrollably sobbing for much of the service. I was embarrassed and not really expecting to cry as much as I did. Grief is such a hard thing for everyone to go through, especially when you lose someone that is so important in your life.
You are my role model. You lived your life so beautifully, and although I was only a part of 17 years of your life, I learned so much about you. I loved all the phrases you used to say, like "at any rate" and "that would be a good plan". But my favorite thing you used to say is "Don't let your circumstances rob you of your joy". I have that written on a sticky note on my desk in college, and I think about it every day. Your legacy isn't just the large family you started, it's also the incredible impact you left on your friends and family. We love you and miss you, but we are so grateful that you are now safe in the arms of Jesus.
Love,
Your grand-daughter.