I have thought of thousands of ways to write this letter, from being hurt to desperation of getting your attention. I have thought of every reason of why I should hate you, and not want anything to do with you. But every time I try I just can't do it.
I would like to say thank you. Even though you were never there, I would like to say thank you. Thank you for not being there for me, it has made me the woman I am today. I have excelled in many things because I did not want to be like you. I have graduated from high school because I did not want to be like you. I have had stable jobs, because I do not want to be like you. I am attending college away from home because I do not want to be like you. Do you see it? The reason I have done so much is because I did not want to be like you, so thank you.
I hope you are doing fine wherever you are. I hope you know that I pray for you. I pray that you finally get your life together. I pray that you will meet the person that you can grow old with. I pray that you will find a stable job that you can have your hard earned money. I pray that you do not mess up with my sister the way you did with me.
I also would like to tell you that I forgive you. It is a hard thing for me to do but I do not want to resent you for the rest of our lives, because who knows either one of us can die tomorrow and I do not want bad memories for either of us. I forgive you for all of the lies that were told. I forgive you for the bad memories. I forgive you for living the life you do.
I hope you can be the father that I have always pictured you to be, for my sister. It is not too late for her you know. I was her age when I started realizing the lies, I was about 10 when the lies started turning into hate, but I was also 10 when the calls stopped happening. I can not remember the last time I have talked to you, like actually talked to you. It has been at least six months since we have spoken to each other. I looked aimlessly for you in the crowd at my graduation but you never showed.
Finally, I would like to say that I am sorry. I am sorry that your childhood was not easy, I mean living in a broken home is not easy, I know that. I am sorry that I did not want to have a conversation with you. I am sorry that you lost two of your children and are only left with one. I am sorry that other men had to pick up your role as a dad in their lives. I am sorry that you are no longer a part of mine.
Sincerely,
Me
