I haven't had the best of luck when it comes to making friends. My mom can attest to that. In middle school and high school, I never really found my crowd. I managed to get by with a few friends cherry-picked from different "groups" in high school.

But friendships were definitely not a highlight of high school for me.

I let others take advantage of me, and I became the mom of everyone. I also did not party or go out on the weekends, which made making friends even harder. Due to my neverending dance schedule, partying was low on my list of priorities.

I knew when I declared the university I would go to that my high school ways needed to stay in the past.

So when I finally moved in, I looked forward to meeting new friends. I left my door open at all times, hoping that someone — just one person — would pop in and say hi. I introduced myself to everyone I could, just trying to be different and outgoing. By doing this, I met my closest friends in college, especially one who I vowed would be in my wedding someday. Or so I thought.

She was my best friend during my second semester of freshman year, and she was there for every moment, good or bad. From the time I had my appendix out and needed help washing my hair because I couldn't get my stitches wet to our 11 p.m. sonic runs for milkshakes and french fries, she was always there.

I could be myself around her, and personally, that mattered to me the most.

She was the person I could dance in my short shorts with like a complete idiot and not feel self-conscious. I was able to be my goofy self, the self people typically did not know about. She could tell when I was upset, mad, happy, tired, hungry or just missing home.

She knew me like the back of her hand.

She knew that I loved my easy mac cooked for exactly the three minutes and thirty seconds the packaging suggests it should be cooked for. She knew that I had a certain playlist just for singing in the shower. She could tell when I needed to nap and even knew if I should be woken up to get assignments done.

She could just look at me and read my mind.

Yes, we had our ups and downs. I can tell you right now, dealing with me is not easy. But we still loved each other.

Going into the summer, I decided I was not going to go back in the fall. I needed to take a break. Although this devastated me, I knew that eventually I would return to school and we would be around the corner from each other yet again.

I did not think that this was going to stop us from being as close as we were.

As time would tell, our friendship proved me wrong. Just like the many friendships I experienced in high school, it felt like it was over before it even really got the chance to start.

This isn't the first time that a person I thought would be in my wedding party left me in the wind, so I should not have been shocked as some might think I would have been.

I had intentions of being strong and not letting her know that I was upset. I'd only lost another best friend — by now I should be used to it, right? But just like it would for any other human, it stings just as badly as it did when I lost my first "friend" back in grade school.

So "best friend," I want you to know that your leaving me behind did not crush me.

Yes, I had a cry sesh. I cried because I was hurt and entitled to hurt, but I picked myself up and kept being the girl boss that I am. I am not mad. How can I be? There's no reason I should be mad. We drifted apart, and I cannot blame you entirely for that.

Yes, I'm disappointed that our friendship has ended, but it has not stopped me from living my life.

I do not hate you, and I never could.

We have had the best memories together, and I will cherish the good times. The times when I rolled around on the floor, singing and dancing, will always be stored somewhere special. The time when you held my hand in the emergency room while I was petrified about my upcoming surgery will always be cherished.

Yes, I do miss you every day, but every day I miss you less and less.

And I know that sounds so harsh.

How can I say that I miss someone who was always there? Well, I do, less and less with each waking minute. Honestly, it's reality.

I'll always have a place in my heart for you, as you were always there for me. But I will not wait around for you.

One day, you might decide that our friendship is something that you want to salvage. When that day comes just know - that time came and went a long time ago.

I still care about you and wish you all the best, but that is just what being an adult entails.

I cannot hold grudges all my life. Those who hold grudges are setting themselves up for a life filled with sadness and emotional exhaustion. So, I won't hold a grudge against you, as those high school ways stayed in high school.

Instead, I'll forgive you from a distance.

I wish that our friendship did not end like this, but the world has plan for everyone. I guess this is its plan for us.