Dear 12-year-old Kim,

I can't even begin to explain how much I want to help you.

You're at one of the lowest points of your life. You don't feel at home in your friendships, the kids at school don't really understand you, and you're just starting to recognize your depression.

The more you come to this realization, the more alone you feel.

You're a passive girl. You don't say much and if people want to walk all over you, you practically lay out the doormat.

You figure that if people are treating you this way, you must deserve it. You suppose you asked for it in some way. God, I wish I could shake this belief out of you.

People are always looking for easy targets. If they want to project their negativity and insecurities on someone, they'll go for the person who isn't going to fight back. You're the dream victim. You won't speak up in your friendships, let alone to strangers.

I wish I could tell you life gets easier as you navigate your way to and through high school, but I'm not one for sugar-coating.

A lot of your middle school problems mirror how the rest of your teen years play out.

You continue to struggle with making friends; you constantly want to be alone (you later find out you're just extremely introverted); romantic relationships are practically non-existent, and sadly, you're always just above the water in your pool of insecurities.

While that may not seem like a lot to look forward to, you need to go through these experiences to uncover your layers. If you never struggled socially, where would you find the time to explore yourself?

All those nights you spend in your room immersed in your journal or crying your eyes out are only leading you to further growth. It's a fucking beautiful thing actually.

Those moments of vulnerability reveal all that you know to be true about yourself. It's when the tough feelings come up, the decisions to make a change occur, and ultimately, when you morph into an even more authentic version of you.

I know this is a lot to lay on you. You're only twelve and regardless of how old you may feel right now, you're still a child in the grand scheme of things. There's so much you have left to learn, you have no idea.

I'm twenty now as I'm writing to you. I've got an extra eight years under my belt; while a part of me wishes I could give you all my wisdom and cash in a redo on my teen years, I wouldn't. If I did, I wouldn't be who I am today.

I don't know who I would be.

Maybe I'd be better off, but honestly, I wouldn't risk losing the person I am now.

Every single experience we have gone through is vital to our purpose for being here. We aren't given our struggles simply because the Universe wants to see us suffer, (oh and by the way, you actually believe in a higher power now). We're given these challenges because of what we can do with them.

Life is a domino effect. If you don't go through all the shit you're putting up with now, I wouldn't have this experience to write about. Through my words, other people are touched in the way I wish you could have been.

Stick it out, girl.

You have a lot more heartache coming your way, but I don't want you to worry about a thing. I'm alive and reaching out to you, aren't I?

Everything is going to be fine. Take in the years in front of you.

Laugh with the people who matter; cry when emotions hit you; immerse yourself in your feelings and hell; even scream at the top of your lungs if you have to.

You've got quite the journey ahead, but just think about me. Think about the girl sitting in a coffee shop who is nothing but grateful to be alive. You'll catch up to me someday, but until then, I'll leave you be. You don't need to me to get here.

You need the path to get to the end destination but even then, you're still going. The destination actually never truly ends.

Even if I'm better off now, I'm still going.

There's no rush.

Life is all about the experience, not the rewards.

Just know that I'm forever grateful you were a time in my life.

I don't resent you anymore. I'm at peace with you. I accept you, and most importantly, I love you.

Xo,

Your future self