Through the title of this, maybe you're thinking I'm gonna talk about things you can do for relationships or at least something about relationships. Right? Well, you would be right.

It just seems there have been a lot of misconceptions about what a relationship should be like. We all have those 'goals' that we seem to be aiming for with all of them. It's just surprising how often I see people saying "GOALS <3 <3" on posts about Harley Quinn and the Joker. Your goal for your relationship is to have an abusive partner? I get that the Joker is supposedly focused solely on Harley as his 'queen' and Harley sees Joker as her soul mate, but it's unhealthy. You shouldn't be completely obsessed over the person you're with that you don't see what kind of harm he's putting you in or through.

Personally, I think that the best people to base goals off of are the older generations who married and are still together. People such as our grandparents or great-grandparents. That's who I think of whenever I think of what my goal for my relationship is. I want to be fifty, sixty, and still be with the same person I started a family with.

I've also recently experienced a friend getting dumped due to him being loyal. Uhm, what? Shouldn't that definitely be a reason to stay with that person? It made me think of the social whatnots going around about loyalty being a thing of the past and if you find it it's something to hold on to. I don't think loyalty is that rare to find, but it stumps me that when someone has it that they throw it away. Anyone else confused by that?

Relationships are hard, no matter what kind they are. Friendships, romantic relationships, siblings, etc. It doesn't matter. They will have their rough spots, and you'll have to either work together to get through the rough patch or everything is going to continue to fall apart.

Now, all relationships need a lot of different things, and sometimes they need it at different times depending on the relationship. But the two that are required no matter the situation is communication and trust.

Communication is key because if you aren't talking about the problems or even about your everyday lives, you're going to start separating. If you're not communicating verbally, you'll communicate nonverbally that you're losing interest in the person you're with and with the relationship. If you aren't talking about your concerns, doubts, or issues you might be having with the other person or within yourself, they are just going to get worse. If you let them eat at you, they're going to get worse and worse until you're at the point of being done with everything.

Now, trust. There has to have been some basis for you to trust the other for the relationship to begin, at least in my opinion. If you don't trust people you don't usually hang around them or let them be around you because you're no sure what they're going to do. So for any relationship there is some base level of trust that is between you and the other person. The longer you're together, the more that trust should grow. If the trust between you and the other person is shaky and starts getting weaker, it's time to evaluate why and talk to them about it. When you lose your trust in someone, it's hard to come back from it because you don't know if you'll ever be able to trust them again.

I feel like a real relationship goal is one where you're still together at eighty years old, married or not, but have been able to get through all your obstacles together by communicating and trusting each other to be there. It's knowing that there is no 'perfect' relationship out there, that you will fight and have days where you won't want to be around each other. That it's normal for people in a relationship to not always necessarily like each other. Something I heard and liked, is that love isn't so much a feeling, but a commitment. It's a commitment to get through life together, side by side, facing both of your evils while holding hands.

You don't have to like everything a person does or will do; it's about accepting that person for who they are, flaws and all.