Adult-ing. Verb. The empowering act of coming of age to accept the benefits of being a full-fledged member of society while simultaneously blindly fumbling about for the rules, lessons and tricks to navigating a world of responsibilities you naively thought you were ready for.
I stumbled into adulthood with vague ideas about oil changes and rent checks, relying on a constant stream of text messages to my mother and access to Google to make up for all of the knowledge I obviously lacked. Certain facets of adulthood are incredibly liberating: making your own schedule, pursuing your passions in school and at work, driving a car, general independence. These are the perks I yearned for in high school, watching my sister experience these pros without ever hearing about the dirty underbelly of finding internships or navigating living with strangers. Although still in the throes of growing up, my brief stint in adulthood has imparted on me nuggets of wisdom that no other experience could provide.
1. No one else actually knows what they're doing either.
You are not alone. The life-raft that is transitioning into adulthood is crowded with individuals pretending they have a plan, or even an inkling, as to their future. “Fake it until you make it” no longer lives merely in magazine articles about how to be more confident; the facade of control becomes an absolute necessity to your survival as a pseudo-adult. Stifle the panics of Senior year or facing your landlord for the first time with a big smile and a reminder that you will get through this.
2. It's ok to take yourself seriously.
Prioritize yourself, emotionally, academically and socially. As popular as the overscheduled, overworked, under-slept martyr complex is among twenty-somethings, self-care isn't something to turn your nose up at. Getting your 8 hours of sleep instead of going out with your friends or taking pride in working hard on an essay instead of falling into the shrug-it-off trap of procrastination are signs of self-respect, not weakness. Putting value on your work, time and health may be counter to the “cool-kid” mindset of not caring, but shows a huge amount of maturity. I'm not suggesting going full grandma/bookworm on your adult-ing attempts; sometimes the best self-care is knowing when to put down the books and the bills and treat yourself to some hardcore friend-festivities.
3. Adult-ing is a matter of experience.
The wise words written on the cap of your Snapple or Buzzfeed lists of “27 Things You Need to Know Before You Move Into Your First Apartment” are practical only so far as they are applicable. You will make mistakes. Car bumpers will need to be replaced. Uncomfortable phone calls to bosses and roommates and friends will need to be made. As painful as undergoing these new trials may be, the month you ate Ramen and generic-brand peanut butter (because you “accidentally” blew your grocery budget on back-row tickets to Adele) will teach you more about being an adult than any self-help book could ever impart.
Being an adult may not always be easy. It may not always be fun. But the stresses of loans and contracts and feeding yourself are countered by the joys of moving into your first apartment, wild, late-night adventures with your closest friends and recognizing that, for all your floundering and self-doubt, you are becoming a tried and true adult.
