"...Any, anywhere/that you tell me to..." Few people can read the beginning line of that theme song and not be able to recall the rest of it. In some capacity or another, most millennials grew up with "Gilmore Girls." Fan or not, it's difficult to deny that there are wonderful lessons to be learned from the show. It's a perfect mix of heartwarming, funny, bittersweet and romantic. As a "Gilmore Girls" fanatic, I'm always noticing new nuances in character relationships, dialogues and more. To me, the most important part of the show is the different family relationships. I could dissect each and every one of those relationships and have fun doing it, but first, we need to focus on the three core relationships of the show: Lorelai and Emily, Rory and Lorelai and Lane and Mrs. Kim.
1. Lorelai and Emily Gilmore
To say that Lorelai and Emily Gilmore have a strained relationship is not an overstatement or a spoiler. Lorelai tries her hardest to make Emily accept her and gets frustrated when Emily is difficult. In fact, Emily is controlling and nosy as a mother and grandmother. She meddles in Rory and Lorelai's personal lives and tends to make a mess of things more than she helps them. Emily cannot understand Lorelai's rejection of her privileged upbringing. It's easy to see why she and Lorelai can't get along, until you look deeper. It wasn't until I watched the show a second time that I realized Emily isn't spiteful. She's difficult and petty, yes, but she loves her daughter. She wants nothing more than to be close to Lorelai, though her stubbornness often gets in the way. Lorelai and Emily have no shortage of ups and downs, but through it all, one thing is clear: blood does run thicker than water. When it matters, they put their differences aside and come together. One of the most heartwarming scenes is watching Emily and Lorelai come together for the mother-daughter fashion show to benefit Chilton, or watching them bond after Mia's wedding. By the end of the series, Lorelai reassures her mother that their Friday night dinners won't end, and I think they give hope to strained mother-daughter pairs everywhere. It's possible to overcome family differences and history to come together from across two worlds.
2. Lorelai and Rory
Lorelai is the mother we all wish we had, and Rory is the daughter we all want to be. It makes sense, then, that the central characters and the mother-daughter pair of the show are the quintessential best friends. They have movie nights, tell each other everything and are the definition of partners in crime. Lorelai has always put her daughter first, and in turn, Rory is there for her at the drop of a hat. Ultimately, they support each other through thick and thin. Lorelai treats Rory as an equal and with respect; though she knows when to pull "the mom card." Of course, they have their own ups and downs-season six is a rocky one for us Lorelai/Rory fans. However, not only do we realize that it can be cool to be close to your mom, it can be beneficial too. After all, she's your ultimate supporter, your number one fan. I could go on for pages about all the wonderful aspects of Lorelai and Rory's relationship, but for now, we move on.
3. Lane and Mrs. Kim
Last but never least, I couldn't write a Gilmore Girls post and not mention Mrs. Kim. A true tour de force, she makes my nineteen-year-old self quake anytime she mentions religion and evil. Perhaps only slightly different from Lorelai and Emily, Lane and Mrs. Kim represent not only the true generation gap but also the cultural gap that can often happen with first-generation children and their parents. Until the fourth or fifth season, Lane is forced to hide an "alternate" life in the floorboards of her room. It consists of rock music, makeup, and non-Mrs. Kim approved clothes. Meanwhile, Mrs. Kim is staunchly religious and traditionally Korean almost to the point of oppression. In her mind, she is doing what she believes is best for Lane; in a later confrontation, we see that she cannot compromise with Lane and sends her packing. However, fans will be relieved to see the two Kims reconcile and bond as Lane goes through an engagement, wedding and then pregnancy. The pair began the series as polar opposites, but ended with a newfound appreciation and respect for each other. From the two Kims, we see that even the most strict and traditional parents can compromise with their children as long as they are happy.
Love is the concept at the center of these three pairs. Emily showed her love in a way that was infuriating but somewhat understandable. Mrs. Kim expressed love in a rather frightening but well-meaning manner. Lorelai expressed love by treating Rory as an equal in their house and mother-daughter relationship. Next time you watch an episode, take a closer look at how the Gilmores and their friends interact-it's not just funny. You might learn a thing or two.
