I haven't been on here in a little while, and I'm sorry about that, but finals have been kicking my butt for the past few weeks. But as of now, I am officially done with my first semester of sophomore year. As with every coming semester, the work seems to get harder and harder. I can't really complain, though, because I'm not spending all this money on a school so I can just twiddle my thumbs all day. Anyway, I'm getting sidetracked; I just figured you guys needed some sort of explanation into my leave of absence. Honestly, you probably didn't even notice.

Moving on.

I'm really excited to go home for the holidays, but not so much about the fact that I won't be seeing my roommates for at least eight months. And no, I don't have some astronomically long winter break, but for reasons I'd rather not put on the internet (yet) I'm not going to see them for a while.

I knew this day was coming and honestly, at first, I was okay with it. It didn't feel real to me yet, probably because I was always so busy with a project, or a paper, or an exam; but the time has come for me to leave and it's really sinking in how much I'm going to miss them. This year, there has been more consistency and familiarity that I didn't have during my first two semesters.

The realization came last Sunday; we all went out for one final lunch as a suite, and it was such a fun time. We talked and laughed, and it soon became one of my best memories with them. Later that day, we exchanged gifts and that's when the waterworks began. Anyone who really knows me understands that I hate crying more than almost anything else in the world. I know it's a healthy thing to do, and I completely understand why other people do it, but I just hate doing it. That night, though, I just couldn't help it.

One of my suitemates and I have a running joke (that I won't even waste time trying to explain because it honestly makes no sense), and the gift we were given just encapsulated our friendship so perfectly that I couldn't help it. Well, actually, I was keeping it together, but then she started to cry, I joined in.

She was the first to leave, and taped a beautiful letter to my door that left a huge hole inside me (that sounds a lot grosser than intended), and as each day passes, another one goes. With each person that leaves, the hole just gets bigger and bigger (okay, I really need to stop with this analogy). If you guys read this—which, in fairness, you probably won't— just know that I love you all so much and I just want to thank you for everything you have contributed to my life. You guys were there through some of the worst experiences of my life, and you will never know how much that means to me. I'm sorry if this is the first time I've ever made that clear, but I'm not so good with expressing emotion.

To live with people that are so genuine and so thoughtful has really touched me and that is what I am going to miss the most.

There is no doubt in my mind that we'll keep in touch and when I return I hope it's like I've never left.