Brief prolog: Getting into an argument with anyone is a headache. Getting into an argument with not one, but two of your closest friends is literally hell on Earth, especially when you know you’re in the wrong.

One of these arguments occurred this morning with my big, my twin, and I and let me tell you I was so furious I broke a coffee mug (sorry roommates). I stormed around my house, ranting about how the argument was complete BS and that there was no reason for me to be getting yelled at, even though in the back of my mind I knew that they both had a right to be upset with me.

To get my mind off of the morning’s events, I grabbed a new book, an unbroken mug full of coffee and sat down to simmer down. I looked over at the mug, made for me by a friend, and I read a quote written down the handle.

“No matter how hard the past, you can always begin again.” –Buddha

Call this a divine intervention or an epiphany if you will but a ton of logic hit me out of nowhere like Vee hit Red with a slock in Orange is the New Black (season two, in case you’re wondering).

Now for my point: maybe, just maybe, a big part of growing up and maturing is to stop playing victim and swallow your pride, admit you’re wrong, and saying you’re sorry and if you do so, maybe, just maybe, you can get a fresh start.

I grew up always having to be defensive, whether it was against my mom or brother or teachers at school. I grew up always having a snarky remark to counteract any accusation thrown my way. More often than not, this got me into some serious trouble and usually ended up with me sulking away, bitter and hostile. Quite frankly, it’s a miserable attitude to have, and cost me friendships that if I had not been so self-justifying would still have.

My big and my twin are two amazing women. They are strong and independent and they both inspire me to be a better person myself. Are they two people I’m willing to lose over a petty game of emotional tug-of-war? Not in the slightest.

I believe, as growing human beings, young adults have the biggest pride issues. Given, there are always exceptions, but for the most part, my generation is literally a bunch of stubborn assholes that can’t say sorry to save their lives, me being a prime example. I’ve finally realized that a huge step in growing up is setting aside that anger and inflexibility and simply saying, “I was wrong. I’m sorry. Let’s fix this.” Easier said than done, of course, but does anything in life that is worthwhile come easy?

All in all, it’s too easy to get caught up in negative emotions, especially in the heat of an argument. Saying sorry is probably one of the most difficult things we as emotional creatures have to do, but it’s necessary to grow and mature into a good human being. Holding grudges and being overly prideful is meant for high school kids, a part of our pasts. Beginning a new stage in our lives, college requires “attitude makeovers”. It’s not easy. Lord knows it is not easy in the slightest. But it is so worth it when you look back in fifty years and you’re still best friends with your sorority twin and big or your roommate or whoever else in your current life that you bicker with yet love to death.