It's just hair. It shouldn't be such a big deal.

But it is. At least, it always has been an issue of mine for as long as I can remember.

I was blessed, or cursed, with naturally curly hair. Ever since I was a baby, my hair has done its own twisty and curly thing. For the longest time, it didn't even grow down. It grew up and out, getting thicker, but not longer. And I was totally fine with my hair until fifth grade.

That's when I noticed all the other girls had long, straight hair that I thought was really pretty. I didn't have that. Mine was short, curly and frizzy. I started to compare my hair to other girls', and wished I had their long, luscious locks.

Sixth grade was when my hair envy got even worse. People would constantly tell me I should straighten my hair, so one day, after pleading with mom to help, she straightened it for me. It took us about two hours to get it all done. I remember looking at myself in the mirror and, for once in my life, liking my hair. It was pretty long, and I could actually run my fingers through it! I was excited to show everyone at school my new 'do.

Unfortunately, the reception was not what I thought it would be. People told me they liked it, but they went a step further than that.

"Wow, it looks so much better straight!"

"You should straighten your hair all the time!"

Let me give you a tip — those are not compliments to someone with naturally curly hair. You don't tell them their hair looks better straight. I was insulted many times that day with the same remark, even though I knew people didn't mean to be rude. They just didn't understand my hair issues.

After that, I always wanted to straighten my hair, but never did, because it took so long. I would actually cry because I hated my hair so much. In sixth grade! I was just 12 years old and already unhappy with a physical aspect of myself. I remember desperately wanting to have long, straight hair and not understanding why I was given the complete opposite. I didn't think it was fair.

In seventh grade, my hair stylist introduced me to the world of hair products, and it made a huge difference. Then, my hair was more under control, and the curls were tighter and more defined. I actually didn't hate it as much! There was an improvement in the texture and look, so I began to be more accepting of my hair. As I got older and finished middle school, I no longer cried over my hair or wanted to straighten it every day. I had started accepting that this was my hair, and there wasn't anything I could do about it.

Currently, I'm at a 50/50 with my curly hair. Some days I like it, some days I absolutely hate it. There are days when I think my hair is on point and I love the way it curls. There are times when I wish I had straight hair that I could easily comb and be done with. Hair envy still flares up from time to time when I see girls with beautiful, long, thick hair that can be styled many different ways. I'll even admit to recently crying once again over my hair, like I was back in sixth grade, because I don't like what's happening to it. It doesn't matter how many people compliment me on it, tell me they wish they had naturally curly hair or tell me I'm blessed — I have days when I just don't like it, and it seems like nothing anyone says will change that.

But this time, I understand. I understand that for some reason, God decided to give me naturally curly hair, not straight hair. I should stop looking at it as a curse and find the beauty in it. At the end of the day, it really is just hair. It doesn't define me, and I need to stop letting it do that. I have more to offer people that just physical looks.

My whole life, I've been learning how to accept and even like my hair, and that can't happen if I'm constantly bashing myself over something I had no choice in.

I think it's important for us to appreciate the beauty within ourselves, instead of wishing we looked like someone else, or had what they have. What makes us different and unique makes us special, and that's something to be cherished. God gave us different features because he finds them beautiful, and even though it's hard sometimes, we need to start finding them beautiful too.