According to my friend, Mr. Google Search, the term, "independent" can mean a number of things. The most popular definition is literally, "to be self sufficient." Okay, so what does it mean to be "self-sufficient?" Again, my friend, Mr. Google, says that being self-sufficient is feeling like you need no outside help in feeling fulfilled.

Now that we understand what Google has to say about being independent and self-sufficient, we can begin to look at how society sees the term, "independent."

I asked a handful of young women and men, also my dad, "What does it mean to be independent?" Here are a few of the responses that I got.

1. "To be on your own, self-sustained. To know you have your own back. To know where to look for help when you know you need it." -Gabby Stenson, Bemidji MN, 19

This was my favorite response that I got. Especially the part about knowing where to look for help when you need it. Although my definition of independence is biased for this article and doesn't quite make sense, I think that a key part in being independent depends on being your own back bone and relying on yourself solely.

2. "Where you do everything yourself and you don't rely on anybody else. For money, food, stuff like that." -My Father, Bemidji MN, 34

This is a very basic answer, if you are looking for a strict book definition for an assignment. However, what does it even mean, "to do everything for yourself?" Am I not considered independent based on my dad's answer because he pays for my car? Hmmm....

3. "I would say for me it means not needing someone to validate how I feel, I used to need people to tell me that I was pretty and that I was smart and all that but about a year ago I realized that I don't need anyone to tell me those things because I'm strong and I know my strengths and weaknesses, I don't care what people think about me, I love my life and people can have an opinion about me but it doesn't affect who I am. It took me a while to figure that out but now that I know it, I feel so much better because how I feel about myself doesn't depend on another person. If that makes sense!" -Molly Strand, Bemidji MN, 18

This the most in depth answer that I have gotten and for it to be from a young girl who hasn't even graduated high school yet, blows my mind. This response is so deep and covers independence across a wide spectrum. To try and piece together my own definition by the end of this article, "to know your own strengths and weaknesses" is a powerful part of Molly's definition that isn't ever talked about. Why don't we encourage young women to find their own strengths and weaknesses at a young age?

4. "Lets see — to me, being independent is being able to have individual thoughts and opinions or conscious actions that take no directive from others. Also to be able to care/handle ones self without requiring another to do things for them." -Andrew Owen, Minot ND, 21

5. "It means knowing yourself, your boundaries, and what you want out of life. It means knowing that the only person you can change is yourself. It means being willing and able to accept responsibility for, and the consequences of any actions or decisions you make. It means doing the right thing, even when it's hard, or not popular and when it will be emotionally, financially or physically difficult to do." -Ervin Swan, Cass Lake MN, 23

6. "Gotcha! I guess to me, Independence means not relying on others to validate my worth or existence! Being independent, you KNOW your worth! I'm not saying you don't need other people in our lives, you definitely need friends, family and relationships!" -Sarah Bessler, Bemidji MN, 30

The last two responses were from young men that I associate with. Let me tell you, if you saw either one of these men, you wouldn't guess that they would have said what they did just now. I want to argue here that that the last half of number five is the most powerful out of these six responses. "It means doing the right thing, even when it's hard, or not popular." This is arguably the most difficult concept to grasp as you grow up.

As we wind down on this week's piece, I want you to keep in mind a few things. There is not a set-in-stone definition for the term "independence." Your definition and mine may be different, but that's okay because we are different people who live different lives. Sometimes, independence can mean ordering your own food at a restaurant.

So, to return to my initial "point," what does it mean to be independent in 2018? I think we can see within these responses that knowing what you're worth and knowing that you can rely on yourself is ultimately independence. I feel as though older generations definitely have a different idea of what independence should look like, but the reality is that independence is constantly changing as society changes. What my great-grandma may call being independent in the 1950's, we may call basic living today and vice versa.

To me, when I think of independence, I think of being romantically independent. What I mean, is that I am not 100% financially independent, I live with my parents when I'm not attending University, and I rely on my parents to help me make choices just for the simple fact that I lack a level of confidence in myself that is needed in order to make certain decisions.

However, if we talk about being romantically independent, I am that. I don't rely on men, a significant other, or someone else to hype me up, pick me up when I'm down, or do other things that I would consider to be tasks of daily living. I think that I am very independent in my relationships because I have been through so much regarding relationships that I know what I want and what I deserve when I'm with someone. Whether that someone is a romantic partner or a friend, that doesn't matter. What matters ultimately here, is that I know what I want and what I deserve and I won't settle for anything less than that.

So, whatever you think independence is, you're not wrong. Let your life experiences be the foundation for which you define the things around you.