You want him back don't you? When he texts you your heart still races and you get butterflies. All you want is everything to go back to the way it was before.
It won't though.
Around everyone else you act fine as if missing him isn't killing you. But, when you're by yourself all you want to do is cry and breakdown. You think of all the happy times you two had together, all the memories you shared, and you want all of that back.
You type his name in your phone to text him or call him, you think of all these things you want to say to him. You play it out in your head, how it will be if you go back to him. All you want is him to realize he was in the wrong, he is the one who messed things up between you two. But, he blames it on everything else but himself.
He's not the man you fell in love with anymore. He's someone totally different. He is someone you don't even know anymore. You desperately want things to go back to the way they were, you want him to change back into the man you used to know.
The truth is guys like him don't deserve girls like you, yet you still are in love with him. No matter how bad he hurt you, or how bad he treated you, he still melts your heart. You don't think about the bad times, you think about the good times and that is all that matters.
So when he texts you, apologizing, being sweet and wanting you back, you fall for it. You think it will work this time, that he has changed but, it's all just a front. He acts all sweet like everything will be better this time. You know eventually though, he will be doing the same sh!t. Treating you badly, not putting forth effort in the relationship, and even cheating again.
So this time don't go back. Don't fall for it again. Being apart from him you have grown and became a better person. It is time to let go of that chapter in your life. Yes, it is hard as heck because he is all you knew for so long. He was such a big part of your life that now you can't imagine a life or future without him in it. That is okay though. It is going to be a long and bumpy road getting over him but, you can do it.
I know what you are going through. I know the heartbreak and pain you are feeling. I also know that this won't last forever. Eventually, he will just be a distant memory. Someday a man will come along and treat you the way you are supposed to be treated. Someone who won't leave and then want to come back. Someone who you will be able to trust with all of your heart and someone who will never hurt you.
So it is time to move on to the next chapter in your life. Yes it easier said than done. But in the long run, it will be the best decision you made not going back to him. Don't let him consume you anymore. You are so much better without him.
