I keep my friend circle small and my family close and there's one thing that will always be the most important thing in any friendship or relationship I have and that's loyalty.
I was slapped in the face with reality about a year ago when a group of people who I considered very close friends all disliked me behind my back. They talked bad about me, told their family members and other friends lies, and snuck around... But I didn't know. When I found out, I was faced with the decision to not have them in my life anymore or continue to let things be, but I couldn't do that. I couldn't continue to let things be and turn a blind eye, knowing I was being lied to, knowing people weren't being honest and were sneaking around behind my back. I had given everyone multiple chances to be honest with me, yet they continuously decided not to be. They had loyalty to each other (which I respect), but no loyalty to me, so I dropped them from my life.
It was a tough decision and sometimes when I run into those people it's extremely awkward. To be honest, some of them they act like I don't exist and I'm actually okay with that. Others try to make small talk like we're still friends. I'll never be outright rude and I'll never be mean, but I definitely wouldn't trust them with a real conversation. I don't trust them with anything, but I'll be pleasant.
I don't think there's any better feeling than knowing someone has your back. I think it's the most comforting feeling when you have people around you that you can rely on. Obviously, sometimes you need to vent. I think everyone's guilty of talking behind someone they love's back, but there's a difference between venting and not being loyal. Everyone should know that difference.
If you're faced with the decision to put up with people you know aren't being loyal to you or being on your own. Trust me when I say, try being on your own. You'll find out who your real friends are. You'll find out who has your back and who you know you can rely on and trust. It'll bring you more peace knowing you have less people in your life, but real people and people you can count on, rather than people you're constantly feeling uneasy about or are unsure whether or not they have your back.
