We have been raised to defend ourselves. We defend ourselves from everything because we're afraid of letting our guard down and getting hurt. Maybe you weren't raised that way, but you learned defensiveness from a time someone broke your trust, or hurt you. But no matter what the reason is, I think it's time to embrace kindness.

Being kind doesn't mean you're a pushover. My cousin is one of the most powerful, dynamite, and strong people I know, while also being compassionate, generous, and understanding.

Even in trying times, I never see her get frustrated at anyone.

She remains patient, and it rewards her. But, I have seen her protect herself, and especially people she loves with pure, firey strength. She has taught me that balance is the key to being kind to yourself and to others.

If you haven't met my cousin (I feel kinda bad for you) then I'll give you another example of a woman who shows her strength through kindness.

Melanie Hamilton from "Gone with the Wind" is probably not who you were expecting me to say, but she's a classic example of how you can be strong and kind. In case you haven't seen "Gone with the Wind" (I REALLY feel bad for you), I'll explain Melanie's character. She is married to Ashley Wilkes, her first cousin...yikes.

Scarlett O'Hara, the town's most beloved yet vain woman, is in love with Ashley. Scarlett does a number of things to try to win him over, including kissing Ashley despite knowing he is promised to Melanie.

At first glance, Melanie seems kind of naive and aloof about the flirtation between them. It soon becomes clear that she does know, and then you wonder, "Why doesn't she have a reaction?" I thought about this a lot, and I realized that Melanie holds a lot of power by staying calm and kind.

She is in control of her own emotions and doesn't let outside forces dictate how she feels. She is choosing to be kind. And that is powerful.