Kids Change Your Life When You Think You're Changing Theirs

How Kids Change Your Life, When You Think You’re Changing Theirs

Working with kids, whether it be babysitting or somewhere like a Boys and Girls Club, can make an amazing improvement in your life.

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I worked at a Boys and Girls Club in my hometown throughout my senior year of high school. Now that I've started my first year of college, I can't be there all the time but I go back and work at the same club over breaks.

When I was hired, my boss told me and all the other employees how important we were in these kids' lives; we had the power to be positive role models for kids who didn't have one. That was the reason I had decided to apply for the job in the first place: I wanted to help create a fun, safe environment for the youth. What my boss didn't tell us was that the kids we were going to be working with would change our lives for the better, too, and here's how:

They can help you expand your horizons, thinking and opinions.

If you've ever talked to kids before, you know there's really no such thing as a "normal" conversation. They'll say the weirdest things and give the weirdest explanations for them, but that doesn't mean they're always wrong. Sometimes, you'll get a kid who says something that seems really bizarre, but when you stop to think about it they actually have a point. Maybe they don't completely change your opinion, but they definitely give you something to think about.

They help you embrace your inner child.

Some of the best parts of being young are getting to run wild and free, playing make-believe or with dolls, building with Legos, coloring and so much more. When you work somewhere like a Boys and Girls Club, it's your job to make sure that the youth are not only safe and learning, but also to connect with them. There's no better way to make that connection than to get in touch with your inner child. This is also a great stress reliever; I know working with kids sounds like it's more stress-inducing than -reducing, and it can be, but it's good to have a place to feel young and blissful again.

They’re amazing mood and self-esteem boosters.

After a long day of school or work, nothing beats having a group of kids so excited to see you that they run to you and give you a huge hug. When it's free time or they're given time to color, at least half the kids will draw a picture or write a message for their favorite adult in the room, showing you how much they appreciate you. And when you draw or write something for them in return, they never fail to say how perfect they think it is and how happy it makes them.

You’re free to be yourself, because they’re head over heels for the real you.

While in many other instances throughout your routine week or day you may have to put on a facade or act in a way that isn't really you, you never have to be anyone but your real self with kids. They love the quirky, goofy person that's inside most of us. They love the people that make bad jokes or puns just to try and get them to laugh. They love the guy that plays the same video games as them and will have long conversations about them. Just like they love the girl who's interested in conspiracy theories and will tell them a new one every time she sees them. And the guy who walks into a room and lightly hits them on the head with a piece paper while making a weird noise and then walks out again. Whatever it is that sets you apart from other people, they never seem to have trouble embracing it.

Working with kids can have its challenges, just like any job, and I can only hope that I'm making a positive impact on their lives when I visit over school breaks, but I know for a fact those kids have changed my life for the better.

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Working With People Who Are Dying Teaches You So Much About How To Live

Spending time with hospice patients taught me about the art of dying.

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Death is a difficult subject.

It is addressed differently across cultures, lifestyles, and religions, and it can be difficult to find the right words to say when in the company of someone who is dying. I have spent a lot of time working with hospice patients, and I bore witness to the varying degrees of memory loss and cognitive decline that accompany aging and disease.

The patients I worked with had diverse stories and interests, and although we might have had some trouble understanding each other, we found ways to communicate that transcended any typical conversation.

I especially learned a lot from patients severely affected by dementia.

They spoke in riddles, but their emotions were clearly communicated through their facial expressions and general demeanor, which told a story all on their own.

We would connect through smiles and short phrases, yes or no questions, but more often than not, their minds were in another place. Some patients would repeat the details of the same event, over and over, with varying levels of detail each time.

Others would revert to a child-like state, wondering about their parents, about school, and about family and friends they hadn't seen in a long time.

I often wondered why their minds chose to wander to a certain event or time period and leave them stranded there before the end of their life. Was an emotionally salient event reinforcing itself in their memories?

Was their subconscious trying to reconnect with people from their past? All I could do was agree and follow their lead because the last thing I wanted to do was break their pleasant memory.

I felt honored to be able to spend time with them, but I couldn't shake the feeling that I was intruding on their final moments, moments that might be better spent with family and loved ones. I didn't know them in their life, so I wondered how they benefited from my presence in their death.

However, after learning that several of the patients I visited didn't have anyone to come to see them, I began to cherish every moment spent, whether it was in laughter or in tears. Several of the patients never remembered me. Each week, I was a new person, and each week they had a different variation of the same story that they needed to tell me.

In a way, it might have made it easier to start fresh every week rather than to grow attached to a person they would soon leave.

Usually, the stories were light-hearted.

They were reliving a memory or experiencing life again as if it were the first time, but as the end draws nearer, a drastic shift in mood and demeanor is evident.

A patient who was once friendly and jolly can quickly become quiet, reflective, and despondent. I've seen patients break down and cry, not because of their current situation, but because they were mourning old ones. These times taught me a lot about how to be just what that person needs towards the end of their life.

I didn't need to understand why they were upset or what they wanted to say.

The somber tone and tired eyes let me know that what they had to say was important and worth hearing. What mattered most is that someone who cared was there to hear it.

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My First College Gal Pal Road Trip Was Amazing

Every girl should have one good girls trip.

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In some way or another, everybody has a list of things they want to do in their lives before it's all over. After all, we're human. There's adventure to be had in every life. One thing I have always wanted to do before I grew too old and grey was go on a road trip with my gal pals to the beach. A couple weeks ago, I achieved this memorable milestone, and it allowed me to open up to new surroundings and experiences.

On this trip, I went with two of my friends from college, Kait and Lindsey, to visit my roommate Elizabeth in Virginia Beach. This was pretty big for Lindsey and I because neither of us had been to Virginia Beach before. Thankfully Elizabeth and Kait knew their way around the city, so we never got lost on our way to and fro.

Like most vacations, my favorite parts probably took place at the beach. I'm always at utter peace stomping through mushy sand or leaning down to splash the salty water that tries to knock my short self over. We took pictures and did something us college girls rarely have time to do especially in school: Relax.

The four of us did not live up to the crazed stereotype of girl trips in movies. Although I finally got a chance to sing along to Taylor Swift in a car ride with my friends, so that's always a plus. We played "Top Golf" one day, and by some miracle, I actually won the second game by a fair amount after much humiliation in the first one. We visited some of Elizabeth's family, and I finally got to meet her giant dog Apollo (I call him 'Wolf Dog'). Everyday was another chance to ask with enthusiasm: "So what are we doing today?"

Our trip wasn't like the movies where we all cried or confessed our deepest darkest secrets. Everything the four of us shared was laughter and this calm feeling of being at home, in the chaotic peace of each other's company. We understand each other a little better due to finally seeing what we're like outside of Longwood University. After this, all I can say is that we're most definitely planning the next one!

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