In today's world of cheap flight tickets and in the wake of a neo-nomadic culture amongst our generation, it has become increasingly common for people to find themselves (more or less willingly) in long-distance relationships. While they can be very romantic because of the highly dramatic factor of the distance, these relationships come with some pretty significant challenges.
Though it's true that with all the latest technologies and apps (think Viber, Whatsapp, Skype etc.) distances seem to have gotten quite a lot shorter, these still cannot supply the most basic need for two people committed to one another: actually seeing each other.
While I still await the invention of teletransport with trepidation, I should have to set matters straight: I do not know of a way that will actually get you to see your loved one more often, but there are a few tips I can give to you to make things more bearable and hopefully make your relationship last, keeping in mind that not all LDRs are meant to be.
1. Make time for one another.
Whether it is a daily call or a weekly Skype, or even texting every single day for hours combined with the other two options (I'll admit straightaway that I am guilty of this last thing), make sure you stay in touch as much as possible. There is no way you'll be able to face the distance if you don't comunicate with one another, since without communication your relationship would be close to being non-existent.
2. Make plans to meet.
Be sure to take advantage of any chance you get to meet and work towards finding the time/money to make meeting possible. Effort in this endeavor will be crucial, because even if you finally can't see each other, knowing you did everything within your power will make all the difference to the person on the other side.
3.. Define the expiration date.
While there probably is a very good reason for those miles that separate you from the person you'd rather be with, it is crucial for you both to figure out when this sophisticated form of torture will be over. It doesn't have to be a specific date as much as some sort of plan; without this your prospects will look rather grim and you will not realize if a situation is hopeless to start with.
4. Trust him/her.
This one might be the trickiest part: it's a conscious decision you should make and never look back from. Once doubt comes between you it is very hard to get rid of, so don't let it. If you can't trust someone then you shouldn't be in a LDR with him/her to start with.
5. Be thoughtful, patient, and understanding.
Don't be selfish, impulsive, or overbearing. This is self-explanatory.
6. Don't idealize the situation or the other person.
It's a slippery slope: while LDRs can be very difficult they are not supposed to be hell. If things get too hard there is no shame in breaking up. You shouldn't endure bad treatment from anyone, especially not someone you're trying hard to be with, and if they don't take you or the situation seriously, then it's not because of the distance or because you're misunderstanding them. You deserve the best of the best, so make sure you get it.
Good Luck!
Please feel free to send me any questions at : theOdysseyatPratt@gmail.com. This aims to be an advice column, so I can't wait to hear from you!
