It has been one year since I got to live the wonderful, beautiful experience that is Kairos. For those who don’t know, Kairos is a retreat, typically experienced during your junior or senior year of high school. It is an opportunity to get to know yourself, your classmates, and God. I was very hesitant about going on Kairos. I was so against it that I planned on not going until it was only a few weeks before the retreat happened and they did not have enough students to participate. If they didn’t get enough, then the retreat would be canceled. I decided, with the peer pressure of many, to sign up. The first thing I learned: sometimes peer pressure can be a good thing.
So I went. And it was one of the best decisions I have made in my entire life. You may think I’m exaggerating or you may think that I’m just trying to shove the whole religious aspect down your throat, but you would be wrong about both. I would never define myself as a religious person, but this retreat did help me dig deeper within myself and create bonds with students in my class. I went in very wary and planned on not putting too much effort in, but once I got there it all changed. I was strongly encouraged and inspired by everyone else on the retreat to give it my all, so I did, and I don’t regret a thing.
I had some of the most intimate conversations and played some of the most fun ice breaker games with people who I never in a million years would’ve imagined. I had gone to school with these people for almost four years, and some of them almost twelve, yet I didn’t know anything about most of them. Through Kairos I learned their stories and struggles. I learned that you never really know what someone may be struggling with behind the smiling face they put on every day. I learned how important each person is, even if they are not a part of your daily life. I learned that everyone has story, even you and even if you don’t think you do. And that every story matters.
“I wish I could show you, when you are lonely or in darkness, the astonishing light of your own being.”
Kairos helped me learn about myself. I dug deep into myself and pulled out things that were difficult to think and talk about. I came to conclusions. I thought about my goals and my past experiences and how they all come together to make me who I am today. I thought about how to work on myself and become the best self that I can be.
“Don’t let your struggle become your identity. I am not what happened to me. I am what I choose to become.”
My favorite part about Kairos was how absolutely loved it made me feel. I have never felt more loved in my entire life than I did on Kairos. I felt loved, wanted, and needed. I felt worthy. Every single person deserves to feel like that every day. Every single person is loved, wanted, and needed. You are loved, wanted, and needed. You are worthy. You are enough. Even if it doesn't feel like it.
“I am worthy of the unconditional love shown to me by God, by my friends, and by my family.”
Kairos gave me friendship. I grew so close to so many of my peers on that retreat and I am forever grateful for their presence in my life. The bonds that were created are beautifully unbreakable. Friendship is a beautiful thing, and friendship created out of something as loving as Kairos is even more beautiful.
“Do not wait for love to come to you. Reach out in the darkness. You will find a friend.”
To anyone reading this who may be hesitant about going on Kairos, go. Give it a chance. If it’s not your thing, that is totally and 100% okay, but you won’t know until you try. It will be scary and weird and different, but keep your mind and your heart open. You may get something out of it that you never expected, I know I did.
I would like to thank my Kairos, K49, you have my heart forever. Thank you for all the love, all the jokes, and all the memories. I hope you are all doing well in your life’s journey, and if you ever want to get together and play the initial game again, give me a call.
Remember, we all deserve to be loved. Live the Fourth.
