Last night, after date night dinner and cuteness had died down, I was doing some work while sitting in the couch. Stephen (getting ready for bed) walked into the kitchen and was getting the nightly water for our nightstand. He was making too much noise for my controlling self to handle, so I snarled ‘be quiet!!’ It was then that I saw it. I was snarling at him, controlling him, and I was doing so all while looking at him through the beautiful bouquet of flowers he had surprised me with. I was caught off guard. He pulled the freezer door back and said ‘huh?’. I didn’t say a word. I sat there, drenched in my own guilt and soaking with the realization that I don’t let him love me freely. He may as well have just poured the nightly water all over me. He was doing me a favor by getting the water that night, he was trying to love on me. And I wanted to control it. In my head I was thinking ‘hopefully he gets a big cup, hopefully he puts lemon in it’. WHAT? WHAT AM I?

We all do it.

Scoff when he compliments you, try to control when he’s doing you a favor, assume he has some alternative motive when he gets you something, the list goes on and on.

But that’s not right, that’s not how we should act.

First things first… he compliments you because he BELIEVES what he’s saying. Insecurity and the enemy plays a huge role in this, when you feel like you’re not pretty enough, your body isn’t good enough, you’re not smart enough, not a good enough mom or wife, etc, you can’t freely accept compliments that go against these poisonous thoughts. But LISTEN to them, accept them, embrace them. How lucky are you! And how lucky is he?(yeah girl, you smokin!)

He’s doing something for you, so LOVE every dang second of it. Even if he does it the total wrong way, adore it. He makes the bed but somehow the comforter is upside down? Love it, giggle at it. He puts the groceries away but he puts the cereal where the pasta goes? Thank him and quietly fix it. He loads the dishwasher all wrong? Just press start and roll with it, grinning. He runs errands and forgets something? Shake it off. All these kinds of things are done out of nothin’ but love. So let him. Let him do something for you and not hear your voice in the background, snarling.

He gets you something? CHERISH THAT CRAP. You’re trying to eat healthy and he brings you a chocolate sprinkle donut because he knows they’re your favorite? Devour that thing with purpose. He buys you flowers even though you kinda think they are a waste of money? Put those in a vase in the middle of your house and show them off. He gets you a piece of clothing that ehh, you could honestly do without? Wear it, because he saw that and thought you would like it and look good in it; and in and of itself makes that shirt freakin adorable.

So go for it.

Because remember, he chose you.

Let him love you.

It’ll rock your relationship. He’ll be pleasantly surprised and you’ll feel pampered on a daily basis.