The alarm for your first class goes off and your body struggles to peel off the sacred space of your bed as you dare to tackle another day— another week.
As you go to your first class you transition to your second class of the day. After that second class, a small group where you are the leader and you study with Word of God with other guys in your dorm. Then you go to lunch. A little time to socialize and then you face the scary walk to the library where you face the never-ending challenge of finishing homework.
Then you go for your third class of the day. Afterwards, you have a little breathing room until band rehearsal for two hours.
Then you have homework.
This is only Monday.
Maybe some of you know what I am referring to—a college student's schedule. What I have described above is simply a basic schedule of my day on Monday and Wednesday of a school week.
The fact is, we are all busy.
I go to a small christian college so what that means for my schedule is that it fills up quickly because I am also involved in many different things, probably more than I should be.
In addition to my schedule, I am on a chapel worship team which has practice once a week, and I am a resident assistant which varies on the involvement week to week and I also have an internship at a church off campus where I put in 6-10 hours per week.
Also, I hangout with my friends, and yes I do have friends....
All of this combined results in very busy days. By the time Friday comes along, I am rejoicing because I finally have time to take a breath. I am not saying all of this to brag about how I am this super human—I am saying this to you to simply because I realized cannot do it all, and this week I felt that so strongly to the point of tears.
I cannot do it all.
Going into this week I knew it was going to be a busy week, but there were events and things that people kept asking me to do that just added to my schedule. Now let me just say, that I am not blaming those people—I could have said no.
I need to be strong and say no. Last night I was playing piano at a worship night and it was such a refreshing time and as I looked out into the people worshiping around me, I was so encouraged being surrounded by such loving people that love God. But as people started to leave, and I was left by myself I realized that I was more than tired—I was to the point of exhaustion, and I felt almost dead.
I realized that I over committed myself this week, I began to blame myself fully. I realized that I was running on empty and trying to give more to people but I had nothing to give.
As I sat there utterly alone, I began to cry. Not because I was sad or depressed or anything, but simply because I realized that I was simply human. And as I sat there in my loneliness and despair I simply sat there in my tears and experienced God. He met me in my tears and reminded me that I need to simply rest in Him.
I do not share this for pity, I simply share this to see I am human and I have my faults and I am slowly working on it. I cannot do it all.