Every time I express to someone close to me about my desire to find love, I am told the same thing— “You must first learn to love yourself before you start loving someone else.”
This is a statement I whole heartedly stand by, but it is a statement I have a lot of frustration towards. I feel as if my desire to find love screams that I do not love myself, and that cannot be anything farther from the truth. I don’t mean to boast, but I surely love myself. Like anyone, I love the time I spend being completely alone with my weird, passionate, intelligent, determined, and funny self. If I ever allow myself the time to sit and think about who I am as a person, I am very much pleased with everything I am and everything I have accomplished in my short lifetime. I am proud of myself and everything I believe in, the actions I make on a daily basis to propel my life in the right direction, and the person I have become over the years.
A year and a half ago, I could not say the same. I hated who I was, I hated life, and I hated waking up in the morning. But today, I truly believe that I love myself. I know I love myself because even on the days I have the worst self confidence, I love looking in the mirror at my smile. I know I love myself when I laugh out loud at my own singing and dancing skills. I know I love myself by the way I love other people. And this is exactly why I think that it is possible to love yourself yet still want to find love.
I realize that I am an extremely busy person who has a packed schedule from dawn to dusk… and beyond that. I realize that I have a lot of life and schooling ahead of me. I realize that I do not need love to be happy.
But that does not stop me from wanting to find love. And here’s why. I am the type of person who has a passion for life. I think that at the end of my life I will be more pleased and proud of the people, places, and things that I loved than any other accomplishment, event, or amount of money ever will. I truly think I could be happy despite having nothing, as long as I had people (and a dog if we’re being honest) to love. It is not a secret that I am a lover. I am someone who loves to shower people with love and kindness. Some may say I love too hard, or too fast, but to me—love is love.
I will never apologize for loving you because I cannot help it. I am someone who strives to see the best in people, to love people for who they are, and to spend every day showing the people that I love, that I love them. Being there for people, spending quality time with people, and loving them, is what makes me happy. It is what life is all about.
It might sound cheesy, but I love to love. And although I have no shortage of things to love around me, I think finding love will bring my happiness to the next level although I cannot even imagine what that is like. I have never loved someone and been loved in return romantically and I can only dream about what it feels like to find that. Everything happens in good time, at the right moment, and with the right person. I will not settle for anything less than the best, but I will continue to dream about finding love. So despite popular belief, I believe it is possible to want to find love while loving yourself. As the wonderful Disney Channel original movie, Twitches, quotes, “If there’s anything I know, it’s that love is infinite. You can always make more when you need it. And just because you wanna give some to somebody else, doesn’t mean that you’ll take any away from me.” So go ahead, love, love, and love some more. You can never love too much, and that certainly goes to show that having the ability to love someone else means you do not love yourself.
