It’s okay not to be okay. Being okay is hard work.
I have had many people tell me that I don’t understand their struggles or hardships because my life is perfect and completely put together. My response to that is: “WHAT?! What could I possibly be doing to make people think that?” I struggle just like everyone else does, but what makes me different from others is that I try to hold it together when I am around people. It’s when I’m alone that I really let my emotions run rampant. I embrace the feels in the privacy of my room. I beat myself up about anything and everything. And while I know that it is impossible to please everyone, I’ve learned that I am the hardest on myself. “I got a D on that test. UGGGHH!!!” “CRAP, I have a test tomorrow and I haven’t even looked at the study guide!!!” I let all these feelings out and then I sleep it off. (Because sleep is almost always the best medicine, duh.)
We're finally past that time of the semester when all of our papers, projects, and exams are due. But there is more to worry about than just school. So, if you feel like you have a million and one things to do and feel like giving up, let it out. Scream into a pillow, go on a walk/run, write, vent to a friend, watch Netflix, sleep, draw. Just do something, anything to make yourself feel better. I am in no way telling you to forget about all the things you need to do, I’m saying to put them on the back burner until you regain some mental and emotional energy. Because sometimes we need to take time out for ourselves. And that’s okay too. Once you embrace the feels and start to come back to yourself, it becomes a lot easier to tackle the massive to-do list waiting for you.
We all have problems, but it’s about your perspective. Some people don’t outwardly express when they are anxious or stressed out and there are others who are openly emotional about their issues. These days we try so hard to seem perfectly put together when, in reality, life is messy. Life isn’t all rainbows and butterflies, all the time. Sometimes we get sad and that’s okay. Sometimes we have certain reasons for being sad and sometimes we’re sad for no good reason at all, which is also absolutely okay. It’s important to know that feelings do not make us weak. Don’t be your own worst enemy and judge yourself too harshly. Realize that everyone is a work in progress. We start off as a blank canvas and are constantly striving for the perfect finished product. But we are more than a picture on a canvas. We have endless potential that is unrealized. We are human and flawed and nowhere near perfect. And sometimes we are not okay. Sometimes it takes us a good long while before we are even close to being okay.
And that is okay.
