Our world today is obsessed with love and saturated in social media. Within the last 10 years, it has become a trending craze to post every second of our romantic relationships on the internet for everyone and their grandmother to see (literally). What used to be a private, intimate relationship between two individuals is now broadcast onto the world stage for critique and approval by hundreds of followers.
Glance at your Facebook timeline for a minute and you'll be flooded with relationship statuses and updates. After all, it's not official unless it's "Facebook official." Scrolling through Twitter, you might witness a relationship argument right before your eyes, filled with lots of passive-aggressive comments followed by #subtweet, as if we don't already know exactly who the person is talking about. Instagram is no different. I know of a girl who once posted a picture of several romantic notes her boyfriend had written for her, then deleted it a couple hours later because it didn't get enough likes.
It has become so normal to share every moment of our lives on social media that we often don't think twice about it. However, maybe we should think about the repercussions of this trend on our relationships, both romantic and otherwise. I've witnessed too many relationships crash and burn because of how exposed they became on social media. When followers watch a relationship unfold right before their eyes, they then feel entitled to intervene in the relationship as if it was their own. They boldly confront the couple about exactly what they are doing wrong in their relationship and how they can be doing it better. While the couple frequently ends up feeling invaded and judged by people who aren't even close friends, they also set themselves up for this by broadcasting their relationship on social media in the first place.
Another issue here is the glamorization of relationships on social media. Usually, only the happy moments are captured and posted for others to see. You won't often see pictures of a girlfriend crying after an argument or a status update about how many times a boyfriend has cheated. Somehow, we have come to believe that if we can glamorize the relationship online and make it look good for the eyes of others, than the relationship will be more likely to last. Reality check: a Man Crush Monday post will not rescue a failing relationship.
Maybe it's time we rethink how much of our romantic lives we reveal on social media. Certainly, posting a picture with your significant other on Instagram or setting your status to "In a Relationship" on Facebook is not all bad or self-destructive. But, be aware that as much as you choose to share about your relationship online will be equally returned in unwanted criticism and comments by others.
On the flip side, as followers of other people on social media, we should be careful not to step outside our bounds and get too involved in someone else's relationship. Emotional intimacy and romantic privacy are two of the most key components of what makes romantic relationships special. We shortchange ourselves if we put every moment of our relationship on a world-wide platform for everyone to see.
Ultimately, the amount of posts, pictures, comments, or likes does not define the quality of a relationship. Rather, it is the amount of time, commitment, and love invested in another person that makes a relationship worthwhile and successful. It is time to stop looking for our validation in likes or favorites of others, and instead learn to be content looking into the eyes of the person we fell in love with in the first place.
