In the age of swiping to the left, or finding the nearest hookup, many are left questioning the existence of the classic date. Believe it or not, there used to be a time of courtship and maybe your potential significant other would garner enough courage to ask your parent/guardian for permission to take you out. Then, maybe they'd plan something small like a dinner and a movie followed by a quiet walk in the park where they might sneak a kiss.
But nowadays, dinner is surrounded by questions on who should pay first, movies are synonymous with hooking up and walking is a myth (see our obesity rates). There is a heavy reliance on apps like Tinder or other websites like Match.com or E-harmony to set you up with your perfect person in the world. Eliminating the nostalgia and mystery it once took find and get to know a person. Instead, it is all neatly laid out on a single page profile for you to shop through like your favorite online store. So, if you're like me looking to find love in a more personal way then here are few things to keep in mind:
No. 1: Location, Location, Location.
Assuming by this point you've found said date and have agreed to go out, set a realistic expectation for yourself and the other person on what you would like to see happen. Whether it's the dinner-movie combo or something adventurous like paintball, be clear about what you want to do and expect.
No. 2: Be open-minded.
We all tend to build a subconscious build-a-man/woman shopping list when we are single. The reality is you will not get everything on your list and that is okay. The key is to be open-minded to the love laid out in front of you and be more than willing to receive it.
No. 3: Set an expectation.
No. 4: Don't Settle.
Once you've set an expectation, don't settle. If the plan was to go out on Sunday for brunch at 11 am, then at 9 am they want to switch the plans to dinner, serve them with a strong no. You can be flexible but it's a partly a respect thing you waited all this time to cancel/change plans. Two, that wasn't what we agreed to. Considering all the prep work most people put into for their first date, the outfit change alone would throw me through a loop.
No. 5: Award Effort.
Now that you've had the date and probably had a great time, be sure to compliment and appreciate. This is something so subtle and constantly overlooked but it is very important. It shows that you care, that you are genuine, and you're interested enough to perhaps do it again.
No. 6: Have Fun
Lastly, remember to have fun. The anxiety and over-analyzing can easily kill the first date and suck out any love that may have arrived at the table. The key is to enjoy what you do and who you're doing it with.
Personally, I don't think dating is dead. I think we've gotten lazy and lowered our standards. Hopefully, some of these steps will help some of you as you journey to elevate the standards of a date and find some love.