I don't think there has been or will ever be one solid definition of love. It's a feeling you have and it really is uncontrollable. There are so many different arguments to have on love, and does it really exist? Well, what else would you call this mushy feeling I get everytime I see this person who is on my mind all the time. It's definitely something that can't be escaped or fought, and why would you want to not be in love? But at some point does love become a choice more than a feeling?

I see falling in love as a feeling, and staying in love is more of a choice. You choose to see the good in your partner every day no matter how bad it may get. There was a reason you fell in love, there was a reason you made the decision to pursue them. It usually goes like this: you meet someone who you're attracted to, you get in contact and start hanging out and spending time together and things go from there. Being in love or falling in love rather requires a lot of time and attention and if you don't know who you are, how can you expect someone else to love you? I think it is a decision you have to want to make. You have to want to love someone and want someone to love you, and if you didn't make the decision then you're wasting your time and theirs.

I have never been the type of person who is good at talking about my feelings, no matter the situation. I just can't do it. I want to say I've been in love, but if I was really in love, wouldn't I still feel that way? So, I really just think I had love for who I was with but was never really in love. When I think about spending the rest of my life with one person it really doesn't sound too fantastic unless this person is really just going to change my life and it doesn't look like anyone is making the cut these days. Everyone has different focuses and priorities and I've become my biggest priority, and this probably why I don't want to share myself with anyone. It has become a never-ending cycle of meeting, being interested and for whatever reason, it just doesn't seem worth it anymore. I've had my feelings hurt plenty of times, and I'm stronger because of it. There was so many reasons things didn't work out and honestly letting go isn't the hardest part. Whatever it is that comes after that is where the pain lies. The thoughts that run through my head, how I want to make it work no matter how bad it is for me. Coming to the conclusion it won't work and hating how much time and energy I wasted on the wrong person but somehow I'm left with nothing. All of this has made me realize what exactly I'm looking for, and see that it all starts with me. If I'm not what someone is looking for then I can't expect to find what I'm looking for.

If you're in a happy relationship do whatever you can to open the communication, and try to fix whatever it is that's broken because love shouldn't hurt. Love should be one of the best things you feel in your life. So, my advice to you is find someone who is worth it. What they show you now is how things will continue to be. You're not getting a text back or a call or they keep finding some excuse to not see you, that's just the way it is. There is no other way to see it and sure they may be busy or whatever the reasons may be but people make time for what they want to make time for. There is someone who will move mountains for you and sees the light in your eyes every day. Until you found them, don't settle because in the end, you'll be the one who is unhappy. Don't make the choice to be in love until you know you're absolutely ready, and you know they are too. But for now I'm saying no thanks.