For as long as I could remember, I associated college with the idea of Greek life. I always pictured myself in a sorority, having lifelong sisterhood and friends I could count on, but it wasn't until I went through the recruitment process that I realized that Greek life isn’t meant for everybody.

First off, I want to say in no way shape or form am I bashing Greek life; I strongly encourage it actually, especially the organizations on my campus. Each one is filled with incredible young women and men, and honestly you would be lucky to be a part of any of them.

So, I went through recruitment week, and I was a ball of nerves to say the least. I changed my outfit over 100 times and made sure each and every hair was in place before attending “parties” to meet each sorority. I wanted to show them the best version of myself in hopes of finding my “home”. After my third night, impressions had been made, invitations had been sent out, and I was still at a loss for where I felt I belonged.

By the end of the week, I changed my mind on which sorority I wanted at least 1000 times, but a conversation with my mom helped me realize what would be my best fit. What kind of person did I want to be known as? What organization would I want my name to be associated with? What girls did I want to become my sisters, where would I find a “second home” on campus? At the end of the day, your heart will guide you to the place you feel most comfortable with, the organization you join will be a part of your years to come! And finally, I thought I knew what I wanted…

When I got my invitations on Saturday morning, the results weren’t what I expected to see. The place that felt like home for me wasn't on that list. So, I did what every teenage, over-emotional girl who has their heart set on something and doesn't get it does, I called my mom and cried. She listened to me cry and release my frustrations. At the time, I didn't understand what I had done wrong, why wasn't it all working out like the way I planned in my head (before I even came to college}? I even questioned myself, was it my major? Was it something I said? Should I have gotten my nails done? Stupid. I know.

The thing is, one won't ever know what makes a sorority choose their recruits, so questioning yourself is pointless. You are amazing, and not getting in the sorority you imagined doesn't change that.

I was very emotional, but I decided to withdraw from recruitment because I knew that I couldn't be part of an organization I didn't feel connected to and trust in my heart. Being a part of a sorority is a personal thing for each individual, you should find what feels right to you. Sometimes things just don't work out the way you planned in your head, and thats okay.

Some would say my experience with recruitment is a negative view of what it means to be a part of Greek life, but I have to disagree. Going through this process taught me that I cannot question who I am, and that goes for you too. Sometimes things don't work out in a way that you plan, but it’s okay. In the moment, I thought “this is it, Greek life isn't for me,” but through recruitment I met the most diverse and remarkable young women, and I’m proud I can call them my friends (they are all from the four all-female organizations). I do not regret going through this process one bit, I may not have found my “home” but I left with something much more meaningful than a sisterhood, I left with a better understanding of myself and with incredible friendships.

So, here’s my advice, as I knew you were all waiting for it:

1. Go through recruitment week, even if you don't think Greek life is for you.

2. If you join a sorority, join the place that makes your feel at home, not just for the sake of being a “sorority girl”

3. Throughout the week everyone is going to tell you “trust the process” but trust yourself first.

4. If you don't get in the place you wanted, cry. Cry it out, give yourself 10 minutes, then put on your big girl panties and figure out your next move ,because the process is a long and stressful week.(let's face it, sometimes we all need a good cry).

5. Follow the advice of your Rho Gammas and REALLY go in with an open mind.

6. Lastly, Greek life may or may not be for you, but there is no shame in trying again. It only shows you are someone who followed your heart, and won't change who you are for anyone or anything.