As An Introvert I Know I Come Across As Rude To People, But I'm Not

As An Introvert I Know I Come Across As Rude To People, But I'm Not

I promise it's just me being shy, not mean.

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As a little kid, I was painfully shy. I'm an only child, so I wasn't used to be around other kids, and that really has shaped me as a person. I'm still shy, the more unfamiliar a social situation is to me, the shyer I am. I'm involved in a psychology club at my school because psychology is my passion and major, but I never speak at our biweekly meetings. I'll just sit in the back at our meetings, and I've never missed one, but I haven't been able to force myself out of my shelf enough in there to meet someone in the club to help pull me even further out of my shell. Because I'm so closed off, no one at these meetings really approaches me and when they do, I'm too shy and awkward to have a good conversation with them, and I know I come across as rude. It can become a vicious cycle.

By the end of high school, I had a wide enough network of friends both in my graduating class and in the grade below me that I became more of an extrovert. High school was an incredibly small world compared to college, and I was louder in that world than in this one at my college. I would make friends in each class, we would talk and laugh in the halls and even in classes and be those obnoxious people you wish would shut up. I was in theater and was a former band kid my senior year; I had a lot of different friends. Now in college, all of those people that I would wave to in the halls, talk to during classes, eat lunches with, and have auditions with, are all out of my life. Senior year really shows you who your true friends are, and I realized all but two of these people I spent every day of high school with weren't going to be able to stick it out with me.

I had a significantly smaller network of people to hang out with and talk to following graduation, and it's become even smaller since moving to college, which has isolated me in a way. Yet in college, I've met and will continue to meet, so many new, amazing people. I'm a proud member of Chi Omega at my college, and part of why I decided to go Greek in the first place was to be able to have a friend group much more sincere and larger than the ones I had in high school. I have found that, but after a semester and a half with my sisters, I still find I'm very introverted, especially when I'm not with my family in the sorority.

Bid Day is the last day of rush where you get an official bid from a sorority and then you run home to meet your sisters. It's one of the happiest days ever, but it's also one of the days I've had in college so far that's made me acutely aware that I am an introvert. When we got back to the sorority house, there was a big party to celebrate all of the new members. New girls were meeting older sisters, eating shaved ice, and taking a cute picture on a fire truck together. I was so overwhelmed and so far out of my comfort zone, I may have said two words the whole time had we not been prompted to talk with ice breaker activities. I kept cutting conversations with girls short, as I wasn't sure how to keep them going because I was so overwhelmed by the amount of people I was with. All the older sisters already know each other, I found it hard to approach them because of that. I know at the time I came across as standoffish, I've had people tell me they were intimidated by me that day.

I'm not really the type of person to reach out myself or to initiate conversation. I think a lot of my shyness is me being in my head but there is some of it that just is my personality. Quiet can come across as rude or intimidating though, and I really am not either of those things. I'm just not outgoing enough around strangers or people who I'm not comfortable with. I used to think that being extroverted came with being confident, but I now think that it just comes from how we were raised and who we are as people, not so much how we see ourselves.

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20 Fun Facts To Use When Introducing Yourself

As we embark on the semester, we are put on the spot in order to share interesting details about ourselves. This article discloses possible fun facts to tell others!
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After experiencing my first week of classes, I have learned that every student needs a handy-dandy list of fun facts about themselves to tell other people. Many professors use the first couple of classes to learn about their students, so you may need to think about who you are and how you want to introduce yourself to your professor and classmates. We all have that one go-to interesting fact about ourselves, but sometimes you just have to mix it up!

1. My favorite hobby is...

What do you do in your free time? Personally, I love to stay active! I am a competitive Latin dancer and enjoy teaching and taking Zumba classes, going to the gym, and hiking.

2. I love...

Is there something, someone, or somewhere that you love? What makes your heart ache? What do you miss when it's gone? I can say that I love my friends because I feel my most confident when I'm surrounded by those who love and support me.

3. I look up to...

Is there someone you adore? Who mesmerizes you? Who do you wish to learn from? After watching "A Ballerina's Tale," I discovered Misty Copeland. In 2015 she became the first African American ballet dancer to become the Female Principal Dancer at American Ballet Theatre. Her passion, grace, and strength continuously motivate me to better myself as an athlete and an individual.

4. This art speaks to me because...

Coco Chanel said, "In order to be irreplaceable one must always be different." This encourages me to always follow my heart no matter what. I will never follow society's standards and norms because they do not define me. Chanel's saying definitely influences my character and lifestyle.

5. A funny and/or embarrassing memory of me is...

When you make others laugh they want to spend time and make memories with you! Don't be afraid to embarrass yourself. You will come off as down to earth, easy-going, and loyal.

6. My siblings or lack thereof influenced me by...

I can go on and on about my brother, who is 10 years older than I. We have opposite personalities and despite the age gap, we're quite close.

7. My pet(s) are my life because...

Only sad people don't like hearing about furry creatures, even if your pets are slimy and slithering creatures all human beings enjoy hearing pet tales!

8. I'm afraid of...

Your personality can be revealed by your likes and dislikes, including the things that you fear. I am terrified of change and the unknown, hence, the future is an anxiety-inducing topic to discuss for me.

9. I am the way I am because...

What have you gone through in life that has shaped you into who you are today? Remember to be open minded and allow yourself to open up to your peers. You may be surprised by how others respond and/or what others have endured as well.

10. The most unusual item that can be found in your dorm...

This is a fun fact about yourself that can easily liven up an awkward conversation. Think about your quirks and differences! One item I have in my dorm is my teddy bear, Peter, whom I like to joke is my boyfriend.

11. My dream job is...

In college, "What's your major?" is a widespread question. Nonetheless, skip the boring statement of "I'm majoring in..." and go in depth on what your dream job is (hopefully your major factors in to this dream of yours).

12. My hidden talents are...

Angelina Jolie is a knife thrower. Kendall Jenner can produce bird noises. Amanda Seyfried can crochet and knit. Is there anything special you can do? Some people have rare and unique talents, maybe you can think of some hidden talents of your own!

13. My guilty pleasure is...

I will say it a million times: don't be shy when introducing yourself to new people! I'll start by divulging my guilty pleasure: Youtube's family vlogging channel, "OKBaby"!

Check them out: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCvUCbnwzySKgbKiB_...



14. Some activities on my bucket list are...


This is an easy way to grab people's attention and find others with similar desires as you. Be an adventurer! Go out of your comfort zone!

15. Talk about your best friend...

How would your best friend describe you? What do you love to do with your best friend?

16. Talk about an accomplishment of yours...

You are incredible and have achieved so much! Reveal something that you are proud of — show off a little!

17. This one time at my job...

Bosses breathing down your neck. Curious coworkers asking personal questions. Cursing customers who never leave you alone. Your job can be filled with tons of hilarious situations that can easily entertain a crowd.

18. During the summer...

Any scars with stories? Any summer flings? Any lessons learned from the tanning too long? Now that summer is over, disclose memories that can leave positive impressions on others.

19. I volunteer at...

Do you do any community service? Share a funny moment while you were volunteering. What did you learn while there? Would you continue?

20. [blank] is meaningful to me because...



What do you appreciate in life? What brightens your day? What makes you fall in love? What does someone have to do to make you smile?

Finally, remember to be outgoing! Reveal that three-mile smile and open your arms to learning about others. Spread smiles, love, and happiness.

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When You Decide You Don't Love Me Anymore

I'll forgive you.

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I never thought I would write this, but I feel like I have to: there will come a day where you won't love me anymore. This won't be a sad day, but instead a day I have waited for all along. You see, they all leave and that is perfectly okay. People may not be meant to be in my life for all of it, not in any of our lives but this is normal and although initially saddening it is a part of our lives and inevitably part of our journey.

When this time comes I want you to know that we did our best, that we were in fact in love once and that we had hoped it would blossom into a lifetime commitment but it didn't and I accept that and will respect you always. I know you did not wake up one day out of the blue and stop loving me, I know this feeling grew over time in your heart and that it was not something you planned on. I respect this.

You were the only person I trusted and the one I loved the most, but nothing lasts forever and I hope you can understand there is no animosity here and certainly, no stone left unturned. We just are not those kinds of people, we would have tried everything to keep our love burning bright and tried for quite a while to understand where the cracks began so that could fix them, it just isn't that simple. Love is a long complicated process, you know that and falling in love with me couldn't have been easy, I am misunderstood and stubborn as all hell and I am FULLY aware of that but that does not mean I didn't try to ease up on you, I promise I did my best.

I have always done my best to understand you, to make you happy, to keep the flame alive, but it has been extinguished. Love does that sometimes, it is there one day burning bright and then it slowly starts to dim with every fight, every unrequited "I love you" and every day passing by in which we spoke less and less about the things that mattered and more and more about worthless things.

This is all okay, it is a season of life, a part of our lives in which we do suffer but one we must grin and bear. I want you to know that I will always love and care for you, although it is now in a much different way, now we no longer look at each other with doting eyes and open hearts but instead with the freedom to let go and move on.

It is time for us to go on with our lives and find a new adventure, one that will light our hearts on fire instead of continuing to snuff our joint flame. You will always be in my memory and a huge part of my life that I once had but I accept that it's over and that time sometimes wears on things as it has worn on us.

You are the love of my life and that is truly the reason I must forgive you.

Goodbye, my love.

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