The greatest actor of his generation, or the greatest actor of all time? Tom Cruise might just be both. In light of his upcoming film, Mission: Impossible 18 the Rogue Scientologist, I decided to take a look into what makes Tom tick and other uninteresting things I could waste time researching.
Have you got the need? The need...for speed? We begin by reminiscing about the single greatest piece of movie magic ever: HIGHWAY TO THE DANGER ZONE. But what really is the "Danger Zone?" Why did Goose have to die? How did they get Iceman's hair to stay perfect even with his helmet on? These questions may never be answered, but who cares, the following is for your viewing pleasure:
Moving on now, Cruise is well known for his otherwise psychotic behavior on and off the screen. Finding time to become an outspoken leader (?) for the Church of Scientology (?????) between bashing modern medicine from anti-depressants to counseling for 9/11 victims (????????????). While trying to keep his true identity of Ethan Hunt alive is no simple task, only a man of extraordinary ineptitude could pull off such a feat. When I asked Cruise about how he could possibly keep his movie characters' personalities separate from his personal life, he said, "they pay me to play me, it's the fourteenth easiest job I currently have. The first part kind of rhymed but the second part didn't. SHOW ME THE MONEY! That was from a movie where pretended I to be a sports agent." Incredible stuff.
By immersing himself into a mental state of semi-rationality and sanity, Tom Cruise has been able to do what no man has before him: become the greatest. His balls-deep approach to movie preparation is something to be admired and fantasized about. He is the epitome of the Danger Zone. Did you see that he actually hung off the side of a real, flying plane for his recent Mission: Impossible film? Who else would be even remotely daring enough to do that? Go ahead and think, I'll wait.
