It’s really popular to hate labels. For good reason, I guess. People don’t like being put into boxes, people don’t like stereotypes, “we’re all unique” etc. I totally understand where label haters are coming from. But it always bothered me a bit because I didn’t feel the same way. Am I a bad person? Am I contributing to hate? It wasn’t until after I reflected a bit that I realized I wasn’t exactly contributing to hate, I just really found comfort in labels.

Uncertainty can be fun, you know, adventure and all that. But when it comes to understanding who I am, I’d like to be as certain as possible. I like knowing that I am a woman and queer and a writer and goofy and loud…the list goes on. I don’t feel like these things, these labels, are limiting me at all. On the contrary ­– I feel like a part of me is acknowledged every time I put one of those “labels” on myself. Some more light is shining on who I really am.

Take love, for example. The feeling itself is beautiful; it’s one of the most talked about, written about feelings in the world. The fact that we’re able to give that feeling a name, “love,” is amazing. Suddenly, the opportunities for talking about love are infinite. We know what it is, what we’re feeling. Because of “labels” we have language, music, literature. We can communicate with other people clearly instead of just flailing our arms around in attempts to get our ideas across.

I feel like, as a writer, I really find value in words. I’m glad I can be certain of at least some things in my life (sort of). And part of the wonder that comes with writing is when we take a word with an assigned meaning and deconstruct it using language, turning its meaning on its head. For that to occur, the meaning must be in place first. It’s sort of like the idea of needing to understand the rules before you break them.

Many people don’t want to be put into “categories” or be defined by stereotypes. I understand that as well, but I never understood why naming something suddenly made that thing more susceptible to those very human, very ugly things like stereotypes. Newsflash: people will still categorize you even if you don’t label yourself; you’ll be labeled by them, categorized along with all the other people who “hate labels.” It’s not the labels themselves that are the issues, it’s the terrible things, generalizations, that people connect to those labels that need to be focused on. Because, yes, I am a woman, but there is no one way to be a woman. It's the fact that people are made up of hundreds of labels, not just one, that needs to be focused on. Yes, there are some really "negative" labels that are a part of me. I'm nosy, I'm dismissive, I'm impatient. I'll accept those "negative," very real things as well as the wonderful things.

I think there’s a simple solution here. Along with fighting against harmful stereotyping and trying to make social circles a bit more inclusive, we could also stop giving so much of a damn about what other people think. If someone who is "labeling" me can't actually do anything to put my family and I in harm's way, then I really just don't care.