Every interaction that I have had this week with either close friends or acquaintances usually goes like this:
"How are you?"
*sigh* "I'm tired"
College is a tiring place, don't get me wrong. But something makes the tiredness special. I can't tell if it's the fact that the weather is 75 degrees in late November or the fact that my brain is so fried that simple addition MUST be done with a calculator. It's not like high school where you could sit back and turn auto-pilot on and cruise. College is more like cruise control: the speed is constant and fast, you just have to determine the direction.
The multitude of memes that populate my twitter keep me bright on the darkest of nights and Solange's sweet melodic words keeps me hopeful that I'll always have A Seat at the Table. But when my battery dies and the last song has played, the deadlines and the projects pile up in my sight.
However, I can see winter break slowly creeping on the horizon. I get to go home where the only thing that's important is if I wash the dishes and sweep. I'm surrounded by family who loves me for more than my GPA and their views of me don't change if I miss a couple of homework assignments. The land where papers, projects, drawings, and meal swipes don't matter. I need to go home to see if my tired-ness is worth it. I need this break so I could answer "How are you?" with, "I'm tired... yet hopeful."